where do i go from here?
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|Mon, 02-02-2009 - 8:24am|
I found out my Husband of 9 yrs has been having an affair for over 9 months. I have confronted the OW, told her husband and now our three boys know. I want to try and make it work but I keep getting new details, and different versions of what actually happened. My husband chose to stay out of town when he was only an hour away Mon-Sat evening for 9 months. I tried to be supportive because he loves his job. But it got to the point where he was telling me and our boys that he "shouldn't have to talk to or deal with us while he was on the road" and that we got enough of his time sat. night and Sunday.
I caught him by accident by calling his cell phone at 1:30 am and catching him on the other line. (He has a dangerous job so I have never called him late like that before) at first he said he wasn't on the phone at all (there is an audible beep sound when you call a cell phone and the person is on the other line) then after 20 minutes he told me that it was "a wrong number, he gets those a lot" (RIGHT!) and that the reason he lied was because I am crazy and wouldn't believe him. He finally admitted to a "relapse" the next night when I told him he needed to get his things because he didn't live here anymore.
The woman is 40, married with one boy. She worked at the hotel he stayed at serving free drinks in the lobby mon-thurs. for 2 hours. I have met her several times and she has met my boys. At one point when my boys and I were up there she had her husband bring her son up to play with my boys. Everything I read says that husbands go for younger prettier woman. She is 5'2 (maybe!) and runs about 210! AND I have way bigger breast! She was also a stripper which my husband claims is a turn off.
They talked on the phone constantly, i can not get phone records because it is a company phone. He took a permanent position in that town this fall and will not give it or the phone up. He says he 'isnt the same guy' anymore but I dont see a difference. He even drives past her house on the way to work even though it isn't a direct route to his shop. (Oh and one of the details I learned on my own was that he took her to his shop and 'fooled around' there) I have never even been there and had to look it up on a map