Back again

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-06-2008
Back again
4
Wed, 08-05-2009 - 11:27am

Some of you may remember me from previous posts so you will have some background on my situation.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2008
In reply to: kathy2606
Thu, 08-06-2009 - 2:32am

Hi, I cant really offer any words of advice, just support. It seems your H has a couple issues that you have no control over. HE is the only one who can make a move to get to the heart of those issues. If he is clinically depressed, it usually does not just go away on its own. Then there is his control issues.


My H had control issues (still does at times) and I do believe that men with this problem are prime targets for a needy OW. The MM is many times the one with the most control in affairland. If the OW becomes addicted to him, then he gets to call the shots and feed his control issues even more.


If you have not been to counseling you may find it helpful in sorting out where to go from here. Also, try taking a look at the "180" if you havent already.


May you find the peace you so deserve


iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2008
In reply to: kathy2606
Thu, 08-06-2009 - 6:47am

have I made it just too easy for him, should I have left/made him leave?"

Yes - you are a "given" in his life he does not appreciate you

one woman man huh? not

this guy is really messed up (most WS are) it is not your fault but you need to stop enabling him to treat you badly

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2009
In reply to: kathy2606
Thu, 08-06-2009 - 8:06am

This is just horrendous. First of all this A is and was NOT about you. I can't understand this man. He HAS PROBLEMS. HE NEEDS HELP. You have got to influence him to see a therapist. It is SO UNFAIR he dump his crap aobut what he 'feels' on you because it's just plain wrong.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2005
In reply to: kathy2606
Fri, 08-07-2009 - 10:06pm

You said he broke up with OW last week?


Sounds more like he is going through affair withdrawal. It is just as bad as a hardcore drug like crack.

 

Greatly Missed, Never Ever Forgotten