Books of Interest

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-13-2005
Books of Interest
6
Mon, 04-10-2006 - 3:31pm

I know that we're all usually asking each other about books that have helped us out, so if anybody's interested, maybe we could list the books that have helped us.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-2005
Wed, 04-19-2006 - 9:06am
Thank you, am just getting around to all I missed while I was away....will look into these books. It was very considerate of you to take the time to write all of this. C.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 04-30-2006 - 4:31pm
I just finished reading an excellent book. It's called "Forgiving & Not Forgiving" by Jeanne Safer, Ph.D. It is not a book exclusively about affairs or marital relationships; in fact, it only touches on those in brief moments. It's simply about forgiveness. She talks about what is forgiveness. This is a very interesting chapter where she talks about her interviews with a Rabbi and with a priest and what forgiveness is in psychology and what it is to various people. VASTLY different definitions, BTW!!! She talks about the different types of forgiveness, i.e., intentional, incidental, partial, etc. I highly recommend this read.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-11-2006
Sun, 04-30-2006 - 11:18pm

Thanks for the suggestions, I had not heard of the second book you listed and appreciate the input. I know I posted this once before, but one of my favorites is "Naked Intimacy". It is great when rebuilding for both partners. My H likes it and has learned some things that have helped him to open up with me in a way he had not before.

Thanks

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-13-2005
Mon, 05-01-2006 - 9:55am

The author (Shaunti Feldhahn) of the book "For Women Only" has just released a book called "For Men Only" (her

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 05-08-2006 - 6:13pm

I am reading a book that I got at my local library called "Infidelity on the Internet" by Marlene M. Maheu, PhD. and Rona B. Subotnik, M.A., MFT with a forward by Shirley Glass, PhD. Some of you will know Shirley Glass, PhD by a book that she wrote on affairs.

This book discusses what cyber-cheating is. It talks about a cyber affair going into the real world and then whether to stay or go. Finally, it talks about recovery.

To explain, cyber-sexual activities can include chat rooms, erotic stories, online pronography, emails, video streaming, interactive based websites, private two-way cameras, telephone sex, cyber sex, and real sex. Specifically, one of the things that this book talks about is a continum along which infidelity can be from looking at porn to having a real life sexual encounter. It talks about how easy it can be to move from one to another. Although, it also discusses how people can have trouble with it moving from online to real time.

"The first step along the fantasy-reality continum is poronography... The goal of such fantasy is to envision the right anatomy, find the witty turn of phrase, or think of having sex with a stranger. From there on the continum, fantasy moves to sexual activity involving a known person in the real world....

"The next step along the continum adds the dimension of interactivity, which moves the experience from pure fantasy to what might be best termed 'pseudo-reality.' The simpliest form of sexual interactivity involves textual environments that allow real-time exchange through the internet, such as email and chat rooms. As we move along hte continum, interactivity includes the sense of sound. People use the phone or internet phones to enhance sexual gratification....

"...People must decide for themselves and with their partners what infidelity is, based on their promises to each other."


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2006
Wed, 05-24-2006 - 3:39pm
the book "Coming Apart" by Daphne Kingma is very good. Helped a lot with decision to go or stay.