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|Tue, 03-17-2009 - 8:18am|
Since my H started his 2nd affair, I'm feeling strong b/c I told my him I haven't decided about divorce yet. I want to see his behavior first. I told him his words are meaningless. I haven't shown him any understanding , compassion or affection. I'm being very cool but polite towards him. We discuss everything about the affair,his behavior and how he was inappropriately justifying his acting out. Yesterday he told me was anxious but instead of acting out he just endured the anxiety. I said this was good, he didn't fall apart and got thru it w/out calling the OW for soothing. He is committed to therapy and being honest w/the therapist. He has unlocked his phone w/out me asking and is bringing home any receipts, or invites for business meetings to prove his whereabouts. I told him I know I'll be fine- for him maybe 50-50% chance w/therapy,grit and determination. i told him you have no family(an elderly mother and a sister who doesn't care about him) ,and few friends. I have created a whole world for him and he sees the reality of this.I told him his son would never speak to him again and his daughter who adores him will be crushed. all this damage for such selfishness and immaturity. He heard every word I said. I feel wonderful!