H trying to contact OW? Need advise!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2009
H trying to contact OW? Need advise!!!!
10
Fri, 06-19-2009 - 9:45am

Its been weeks since i ve posted, ive been real busy. There's been great news & improvements, but last night all of that was shattered. The good news is that my H might be getting a position out of town, hence us relocating & "starting over". I felt like that is exactly what we needed. He has been really open & admitting that he has a problem, but that he wants that to change & move forward. It was like a new man emerged & i was very happy with that awakening.


Last night we were together when he got a Private call, he answered and it was the OW yelling at him asking him if he was crazy. He hung up the phone. I started questioning him- as i had no idea that she or he were contacting each other. he told me this story (which i dont know if it is true or not) that she has been texting & calling him private, harassing him, threatening him, etc. But that still didnt explain why she called calling him crazy. He said that she had been texting him earlier in the day. I knew something wasnt quite right about his story. We got in a big argument about the fact that the simple solution to that problem would be to change his number. That we she could no longer reach him. Still, i knew something wasnt right.


This morning i text the OW asking her to please stop harassing my H. It turns out that her cell phone is turned off and she can only receive texts she cant send any. Which is true because when i called her number it was not in service. That discredits my H's story that she is the one texting him. She cant send texts, only receive them. She is using somebody else's cell phone with no texting. Soon after i text her she called me 3 times which i missed because i was in the shower. She left me a voicemail saying that it is my H contacting her.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 06-19-2009 - 2:41pm
Your H is still having an affair
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2009
Fri, 06-19-2009 - 3:10pm

The affair is not going on, he was trying to contact her, but the OW wants nothing to do with him anymore. But if she wanted it i am sure the affair would start again.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2009
Mon, 06-22-2009 - 9:49am
So the OW did not contact me to meet for her to show me the txts. I dont know that to believe now.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 06-22-2009 - 2:02pm
The affair is still going on from your H's point of view - he is still trying to contact her.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2009
Mon, 06-22-2009 - 2:12pm
from what i have gathered she owes him money, i was able to see his phone and saw texts of him telling her to leave him alone and that he just wants his money from her, he ignores all other texts from her. So now i am thinking that she either lied to me about the content of his texts, since she never showed them to me as she offered. i am just curious as to why she offered to show me the texts than she never contacted me after.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Mon, 06-22-2009 - 2:17pm
I think your BIG mistake was telling him that you found out that SHE knows about Texas. I bet your H called her after you asked him "how she knows about Texas" and told her NOT to meet you and show you the texts. He had to have been contacting her or HOW would she know about the move.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2009
Mon, 06-22-2009 - 2:26pm
the thing is that he cant call her- her phone is disconnected, i saw his phone and all the texts he sent after that because he left the phone inside while he went outside, none of them mentioned her contacting me or anything of that matter. The texts were quit dismissive and he asked for her to leave him alone & that his is happy now. They have all been about the money. All i can do is keep my guard up. We only have about a month until we leave town.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-23-2009
Mon, 06-22-2009 - 5:16pm

  • if this is about money -- he needs to LET it go, NEVER contact her again
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2009
Mon, 06-22-2009 - 5:23pm

I agree that he should let it go, he is telling her that she took his money, $900, i dont know when or how.


She has moved on, she has a boyfriend, or so she claims.


I know about the texts because i saw them on his phone.


The disconnected cell phone is able to receive texts for a couple of days after the service has been turned off. I know because i had the same service.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2008
Tue, 06-23-2009 - 8:57pm

If she's been calling and texting him as he claims, then the cell phone bill will reflect that.