I'm so confused

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2004
I'm so confused
Mon, 01-16-2006 - 1:37pm
I've been with my bf for 5 years and back in July he finally admitted to me that he had slept with another woman early on in our relationship. I had always suspected and now I know the truth. He said it's the only time it's ever happened and that it won't happen again, but how can I really believe that? I just feel so up and down in my emotions over this. Some days I am happy and think that someday we'll get married, but other days I really wonder if I made the right decision in trying to work things out with him. Some days I think I should of just kicked him out and never looked back. I still think about it every day and it makes me sick. It's even worse because she had only pretended to be my friend so she could get him in bed. So now I can picture the whole scene since it happened in his house (before him and I moved in together), I know what she looks like, it just makes me want to cry every time I think about it. He said it happened on his couch, but I heard from someone else that it was in his bed, the same bed we currently sleep in. I think he is only telling me it happened on the couch because he knows if I knew for sure it had happened on his bed, I would never sleep in it again. I just wish I knew for sure if I made the right decision by trying to work things out with him. How can any of us ever really know?