Learning new details isn't always good

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2010
Learning new details isn't always good
Sat, 01-16-2010 - 7:34pm

D-day was almost a month ago, but I was under the impression that OW had known that H was M when they first became involved. I swear I heard him say that the A started because he'd talked to her for a while about how our M was great except for the intimacy aspect, one thing led to another, and then she was happy to meet the needs that I wasn't. I just found out through casual conversation with H that it wasn't until after the A started, when he realized that she was starting to get emotionally involved that he disclosed that he was married.

H and I have talked about how angry this now makes me.

We've been making such great progress in the last month (communicating better than ever, being more affectionate and eagerly intimate than ever) that I'm scared of letting this be a setback.

We haven't yet sought out counseling, as our financial situation is currently prohibitive.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-09-2010
Sun, 01-17-2010 - 2:53am
Go on line and find some low cost or free counseling, it is out there and it does help!Well they did lie to us, so of course they omitted truths and lied to the OW as well. What my H didn't know and it was driving him crazy how I knew so much, was that the OW was still having an A w/ her xH who was married with children after her, and she would tell him EVERYTHING about her life w/ my H, even intimate details. My H thought that someone was spying, one of his friends or friends wives and was calling me and telling me, however little did he know it was the very slut he was living with going back and telling her XH now married to someone else, everything and I MEAN EVERYTHING. No one should have to know all the details I know - no one. Apparently OW and her XH had a weird relationship going on and even when she was living with my H, her x paid lots of her bills including giving them a down payment to the place they lived! And then he would tell me... he even gave me the address of where they were living and the phone number ...... sick people all of them.......