No Triggers Books Focusing on Forgivng

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-11-2009
No Triggers Books Focusing on Forgivng
Tue, 05-12-2009 - 5:35pm

Last night I printed out a lot of questions and answers and reviewed it with my boyfriend. I wanted to show him that what he is feeling is natural and with dedication and support we can move forward. And so thank you to everyone for that.
We have so many highs and so many lows but no matter what we both want to move forward.

I bought a book for my partner "Not Just Friends". It seems very informative and my partner appreciated it but it discusses a lot of triggers that would just infuriate him more and so he gave it back to me. He is not thinking about staying or going. He’s staying and we want to be a stronger couple eventually. And so for now, I am looking for a book that we can read together that talks about forgiving and moving forward and nothing else. Suggestions?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2008
Wed, 05-13-2009 - 3:21pm

"Getting Past the Affair"

This is the book we read together. It talks to both sides, BS and WS. In my opinion, it was the best one I read.


"Forgive and Forget"

I'll be honest, I didn't get that much out of this book. But one day I came home from work and DW had sent the kids to a sitter and she was sitting on the couch just crying. She had just poured over this book in one day and had all these underlined sections and made me sit for the next several hours and went over them. If nothing else, it was very cool to see her get excited about a book that was focused on our healing as a couple. She saw lot of things that inpacted her, that didn't strike me the first time I read it.


5 kids ages 15-9, D Day: August 5, 2008

Status: Figuring it out. Together.


We have five kids. Our D-Day was in August, 2008.