sharing a strong song and kind thoughts

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-05-2008
sharing a strong song and kind thoughts
6
Sat, 03-28-2009 - 11:50am

Hey all its ILMW - yah i've been away.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2006
Mon, 03-30-2009 - 10:24am
SO good to hear from you ILMW...glad things have been more positive for you lately.
Avatar for pater_familia
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2008
Tue, 03-31-2009 - 1:22pm

First of all, my contribution to your post:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ECaRVKxftu0

Second, you're not going to be happy, I was in Cupertino this past weekend for a trade show. My bad.

I'm so glad to see you post. I read an article about lists like ours and how sometimes something bad will befall someone and all anyone knows is that they just stop posting. I got really worried about a month back. I shot a few salvos and you didn't respond. Woof! I'm glad to see a post from you.

Things have been good here. I got my thread removed on the Life After Betrayal board. I was a little too "in their face" with my posts. It's just as well. I was having a bad week and was taking it out on everyone.

While I was in California, my Mother-in-Law stayed at my house. That really helped my not obsess. Well, I take that back, being in a hotel room made me obsess. Being away from my spouse in-and-of-itself didn't. I screwed up on friday. I had a lot of time on my hands and couldn't sit in that hotel, so I went to a movie at the AMC, but then I went to eat and drank my first few beers since D Day. Ok, I had like five. I'm not in AA, nor do I need to be, but I was drinking the night DW went to the hotel with the dude, and I've struggled with the fact I was so preoccupied with myself rather than with the things I should have been. I went cold turkey back in July.

Anyway, when I got back from my trip on Sunday, things went really well, I took monday morning off and we had a very nice morning just talking about us. We don't talk about the A anymore. Neither of us can really think of anything to sort out. It's just about the two of us now. When I start riding the bad trains I pull out my little letter from my wallet. "Tom, This is our chance to learn to truly love and care for each other. Wifey"

So were doing it. We made love that morning and no ghosts in the room. I haven't cried in weeks and weeks.

At the end of May I have that same trade show that I went to last year when she first slept with her HS boyfriend. She's making plans to fly out and join me for most of it and that will include the one year mark day. I just think that if I can get through this May, I'm home free. No trade shows until fall.

Oh, I cut my hair, and donated 15 inches to "Locks of Love." And yet I can still pull it all into a ponytail. (he he.) I'm up to 50 pushups, good style. (I'm gaining on you) and I purchase a road bike. I think mine will be as nice as the other mans. Except mine is a honda 1300 retro. His was a Harley. But his first name is Harley so no way would I own one.

Anyway, that's my news from the past two months. I'm so glad you posted.

Thomas

Thomas

We have five kids. Our D-Day was in August, 2008.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2008
Thu, 04-02-2009 - 5:50am

Pater & ILMW, I'm glad to see u both here again.

**********************************************
me & hubby : 26 years old
married for 2.5 years, have a son 20 months old
d-day : August 06, 2008
rebuilding
**************

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-08-2008
Thu, 04-02-2009 - 10:50am

Thanks for another good one for my IPOD


best to you in rebuilding


Midge

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-05-2008
Mon, 04-13-2009 - 8:25pm

hey Pater Familia (and all those who replied to my post here!!)

VERY QUICK - yah i gotta head out from work

TY for your post sir - good to hear from you 2.
no worries on missing me when you were out here. next time you are in the (408) or close, let me know via e-mail (i've sent you two messages thru iVillage ... ahh.. not sure if you got those?) if you didn't want to ever meet in person Brother i totally understand and its All Good.

to you and all those here on the forum, my very very best. i can't express this in one sentence and yes i'm running overtime but F it. love you all, wish you well. and those new to the board - shtt - sorry :( .... but hey -- "how we survive .. is what makes us who we are!"
- from a song by Rise Against ... "Survive"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j8HGTEF9hbI

you new folks : KNOW this and BELIEVE in yourself!!

Avatar for pater_familia
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2008
Mon, 04-13-2009 - 11:07pm

"not sure if you got those?"

I didn't. But others have been able to, You should try again.

My DW's brother just moved out to the 408 and my boss is in the city. I'll try and let you know if I'm out there again.

Glad you posted. I've been worried. But no news is good news as long as you are still changing oxygen into CO2.

I just passed 55 pushups "good style." Gaining on you brother. Miss your posts man. But things are better here. Not like the old days when we were both totally freaked out. DW is reaching out to those girlfriends who used to giggle with her about their affairs. Two of them are rebuilding due to her advice. I'm really proud of her for this. She took the bad influence that one of the OM introduced to her and turned it around and is being a positive influence for people. These women were really going down a bad road and she helped them see that.

Thomas

5 kids ages 15-9, D Day: August 5, 2008

Status: Rebuilding

Thomas

We have five kids. Our D-Day was in August, 2008.