Spouse's sister's husband' s affair.
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|Thu, 10-08-2009 - 12:54am|
Yeah, my spouses little sister is really wild. She and her de-facto husband of almost ten years and father of her three kids invited a woman to live with them. Little sister thought they were just helping her.
Little sister and spouse would sometimes go swinging. Sometimes she would have sex with other women. But because they did it together, she/he felt ok about it. It was with permission.
Well, her spouse began an affair with the house guest without telling little sister. My souse supposed that because of the openly sexual relationship that it wouldn't be as painful to little sister. WRONG!
Little sister is absolutely devastated. It's the same story we hear here. He's in the affair bubble and won't let the other woman go. He says he want's both women. But little sister said no and moved out.
Little sister is saying all the things about how the affair is affecting her that I said to my spouse over the past year. And the spouse is saying all the things that my spouse has been saying to me. "Just get over it" for example and saying essentially that it's little sister's fault.
My spouse called and talked "at" me for almost an hour today about it. (I didn't need a lunch anyway.) My spouse is really on a roll right now in figuring me out. The cool thing is that she's telling little sister all the things about taking care of herself and giving her really good advice.
My spouse is really walking around in my shoes as of late. She's been really self reflective about the affairs and actually saying it out loud to me which is so very healing for me. I've been able to tell her some of the things that the men said to me for the first time and I guess that sort of sets her back on her heals a bit also. Poor girl. She keeps forgetting that I've had conversations with them about her. And she doesn't really know how those went. I suppose that would be frightening in itself.
5 kids ages 16-10, D Day: August, 2008
What I'm doing to rebuild: Therapy, Books, Exercise, Forgiveness.