What would you do if.........

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-07-2009
What would you do if.........
4
Sun, 05-23-2010 - 1:28pm

My H is making efforts now (after I found out about his EA in Nov, and again in Apr when it never ended) to show me that he wants to be with me, but it's not in ways I feel like I need to see.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-09-2010
Mon, 05-24-2010 - 1:01am
9 months since H has been home - 10 month PA - plus 2 hookers - 2 SDs, OW from hell - crazier than a loon - I locked him out after I found out - that was 7 months into PA - didn't speak to him for 3 1/2 months - he lived w/ hor for 3 months - he came home after we started speaking (2 weeks after) so it's still hard for me - MC is a must! Read books, come here! Good luck
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2008
Mon, 05-24-2010 - 2:16am

Women and men may be different in this way.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2010
Mon, 05-24-2010 - 10:19am
I have to agree alot with what myradorm said. To many men just don't get it. Women and men think so differently. I started counseling immediately and insisted my husband start his own, then we started mc. I feel I have nothing to loose in being totally open and honest on how I feel regarding my feelings on anything and everything. I found that it takes awhile for him to really get certain things, but it seems to sink in after a few try's. He is trying and that's what counts too. After things are discussed, especially the hard hurtful things it really seems to help in the healing. I still have bad days but not as many as before. Please see the message called You have got to read this under rebuilding. There is a link to an amazing article explaining so much. I made a copy for my husband and our mc asked for the article too.
Time and counseling will give you your strength and self esteem back, and this place. I hope we both can get what we need. Hugs
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-07-2009
Mon, 05-24-2010 - 1:35pm
That is a good article--I emailed it so that both of us can read through it.