07/07/2007
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| Tue, 07-10-2007 - 9:20am |
As some of you may know, my ex and I was supposed to get married in her back yard on 07/07/2007. My daughter and I moved out of her house a little over 4 months ago, after she told me she did not love me anymore.
Well, I went to my therapist on 07/07/2007, and I was all set to make it through the day with no contact and feeling better about myself.
Well, wouldn't you know, she emails me in the afternoon and says that she was thinking about everything and it is sad that it didn't work out for us. So I go to her house, she doesn't answer, I end up chit chatting with neighbors, and then, when I get home, I email her to say I went by to talk, she didn't answer her door, I talked with the neighbors and went home.
I told her in email that we should get together for dinner and just talk it all out. That, obviously, if she emailed me, and she also emailed me two weeks ago to chat about small talk, then there are still feelings.
She then calls me on my cell phone Sunday morning to talk and tell me she emailed me all her feelings about us and what happened and this and that. So I say, let's meet for dinner, and she says maybe but just read the email first.
Well, the email was pretty much how I felt about what happened and it appeared that she and I could move forward and make it work. The biggest problems were lack of communication on both parts. I told her we should talk it all out and perhaps, we could work things out.
So, yesterday, first she emails me that she made a mistake, then she emails me that she is mad that I have a profile on match, so I take it down and tell her, I want you and no one else. So then, we chit chat in email about going to Italy together, and when would be a good time for us to meet for dinner to talk. By the end of the day, I beleive we will meet for dinner, and hopefully make things work.
But, wouldn't you know....she emails me around 10 pm to tell me she made a mistake again, and shouldn't have emailed me sat, and she feels so bad that she gave me false hope.
So I am heartbroken again. I emailed her back saying, don't ever ever ever call me again, don't email me, don't text message me, ever unless you want to get back together and wear the engagement ring I gave you and get married. I shouldn't have put the unless part in, but I am stupid.
A part of me wants her back in my life but another part of me says, enough is enough...get lost, don't ever come back, and have a nice life.
Anyway, I just needed to vent. Thanks for this forum so we can let out our feelings and have people who can relate to our situation.
Have a great day!
Rob

Oh Rob, that can't have been easy, I'm sorry you had to go through that. But hopefully now you can put aside false hope and really start to move on.
Sheri
Hi Rob,
You are not stupid.
Thanks Sheri and thanks Carrie,
I have been really good at not contacting her, even though I want to. I was all set by the afternoon on sat, and wasn't going to contact her at all until I got the email from her. Then I mistakenly thought she wanted to get back together. I read too much into things.
In my email to her, this last one about not emailing me anymore, I also told her not to call or email me on my birthday, which is Sunday, either. I said my birthday is just another day, just like today is, and just like saturday was...just another day, like any other day.
This really hurts...I know we can work things out. We both had problems because something would happen, and she and I would just assume things instead of talking, and take things personally all the time. Anyway, she doesn't want to, so we cannot make it work.
Thanks again for you replies.
Rob
I'm sorry that happend, it had to be so tough to get your hopes up again on that day of all days, and then have them completely dashed again.
It's not stupid you left the "unless" part in, that's a very human response.
Thanks Sandra
I'm still not past it though, as I emailed her this morning. I am starting to think she is just crazy...I know I am. I know 4 months is not much of anything as far as time goes. Today, I feel so drained and spent, like I have been going non stop for two weeks or something. I cannot get much done at work and I am right back to February when she first dumped me.
What makes it worse is, she and I were actually emailing each other on Monday like we were getting back together.
This hurts as much as it did in February.
I just got some books by Dr. Phil that I hope will help me to get over her. Self Matters and Relationship Rescue.
Thanks for thinking of me and I hope you have a great day.
Rob