1 mth after breakup - just had a setback

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2007
1 mth after breakup - just had a setback
5
Sun, 02-03-2008 - 9:20pm

Well today I gathered a bunch of his stuff he left at our house and boxed them up. I took them over to a friend who lives in the same town as him so she can take them to him. This was a really hard step for me for some reason. I was doing ok with it till she told me that he had asked her this morning to be sure that she gets some specific things.

I had been doing so good the past couple weeks having only a couple "depressed" episodes. I guess it is totally normal though, right? I had been accepting that it really is over this time, but when stuff like this happens I want him back. And I'm afraid that I'm keeping hope that he will come back again. He's done this many times, but this time was the most final since he moved back to our hometown. I really dont want to hold hope that he'll come back because I'm afraid that I'll lose too much time doing that. I'm at that phase where all I think about is the good things about him and our relationship eventhough I know there are many horrible things about the way he treated me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2006
Sun, 02-03-2008 - 9:37pm

Hi Marcie,


What you're feeling is normal and it's normal to remember the good times you shared.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2007
Sun, 02-03-2008 - 10:00pm

Thanks Pinky. I have noticed that when I do get in a sad, depressed mood a little cry for about 5 minutes does the trick and I fell fine after that. I guess that is progress, at least I am not wallowing for hours like I did in the beginning.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2008
Sun, 02-03-2008 - 10:44pm

A BIG HUG FOR YOU!!! It is a process... I'm still going through with it now, even though it's been 5 months. I thought I would have kinda got over him now but my feelings are still strong for him and I still feel his presence.

It's hard I know, but that's why we're all here.... to give each other support and to be there when we need it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2006
Sun, 02-03-2008 - 11:38pm

Having a small cry is good.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2007
Mon, 02-04-2008 - 3:13am

Oh this is exactly what I needed to read right now.
I have moments all the time.
I am going on two months and I just still have moments where I realize "IT's really over."

It's hard, but good to hear that it's part of the process.

Pinkdiamond, my moments happen at weird times too. I can be fine one minute and crying the next. It's all just so up and down.
I start therapy this week and I think that will be good for me.