60+ days and counting
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| Sun, 03-04-2007 - 10:54am |
Well I have finally reached the 62 days of No Contact after an unsucessful first 44 days attempt.
At this point, I have no interest whatsoever in getting back with him. Just thinking how he left me hanging like that still makes me angry and hurt. In retrospect, I can't believe that I still wanted to get back with him afer the way he just cut me out like that and was never honest to come out and say he wanted to end the relationship.I deserved better after 2 years!
On bad days I will cry and wonder "why me?". Why I can't I find a great, honest guy, why did he lead me on and make me believe he loved me as deeply as he claimed, why right before he deserted me he pretended that he wanted to get married to me, even discuss details as to the location, date etc. WHAT A FRAUD OF A MAN!
On good days, I am glad it is over, the stress of the long distance was hard, I feel like a burden has been lifted. I look forward to the day I meet the man who will be right for me and give me the love that I so truly deserve.

That's great that you've made it so far (although I'm scared now that after 44 days you had a "relapse"...I'm on 20 and always thought if I got this far I'd be good!)
It sounds like our situations are similar with the "fraud of a man" issue. It's sad and I often feel the way you are saying. There is no way that I would ever take him back...I just hope at some point I find someone who isn't such the complete opposite of what he said he was.
How far apart do you live/how far away are you?
Congratulations again and hang in there :-)
~Kelly~
hey. been a while since i posted. i'm approaching 120. 4 months. and i can tell you it gets better. i still have my bad days. almost the same situation. 4 years together. planned a wedding. till he cheated and broke up with me. i felt a lot like you - that why would someone lie for so long? why me? i still have days when i'm angry. but i also have days when i feel like just letting it all go. forgiving him though he manipulated me and used me for so long. feel that i am the better person. secure knowing that i owuld never do this to someone else. it's too bad he's done this. now i just feel sorry for him, to have this on his hands. to have tricked someone. that alone is his punishment. i will eventually have put this behind me. i wonder how they will. at the end of the day ladies, i'd still rather be the Cheatee than the Cheater. i can get over being cheated on (eventually) but cheating someone?? i don't know. they have the bigger burden to carry. not us. stay strong. and keep posting. sometimes i feel alone in this strange place of 4 months NC and a sort of numbness.
Thanks
It was what you would a long long distance. He lived in North America while I am from the caribbean. He was born and partially raised in the caribbean and has close family ties here also.
But to avoid a relapse just try to keep in mind what YOU would want from a relationship. If he really wants to be with you NOTHING and I repeat NOTHING WHATSOEVER should keep him away from you.
Keep strong!