6mo pregnant and fob broke up with me
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| Mon, 03-26-2007 - 10:27pm |
im new here sorta i posted on and off cause me and my fob would breakup then get back together..he broke up with me today and a month of being together again(though we have been together over 4 years) he was going through my phone text messages while i was in the tub(we dont live together but he came over last night) and there was a text in there that i had mean to send him but instead it got sent to someone else. it was pretty obscene i was saying in the text(meant for him but i hadnt seen him in like a week so i was being sarcastic in the text) to come see the pregnant white girl for some p***Y for some dinero. so now he thinks i was sending that to someone else it went to a classmate of mine jamie she had text me as i was texting him and it ended up getting sent to her and not him...me not knowing this i thought he got the text so i figured thats why he came over but he never did get it and now he thinks i sent a text to someone saying that and i tried to explain it to him the truth but he said its over now i dont know what to do i feel guilt hurt confused upside down just when i thought me and him where building our relationship up again its torn apart and through my fault sorta and i just dont know how to feel i cry im numb im in shock. im thinking of seriously considering moving from here and tennesee and going back to cali where im from theres just too many memories here or will they eventually pass i mean i like it here but my whole reason for being here and moving here in the first place was for him any advice sorry if the letters weird its hard to get my thoughts types out the way i want to say them any suggestions and hes pretty stubborn and headstrong so im sure he wants nothing to do with me or reconcilliation in a new break up we all have that wish of reunite but mine is gone


Hi vanillasupreme,
Sounds like you have been on and off the rollercoaster with him a few times. Every time you two have gotten back together, have either of you suggested couples counseling to help you through the rough spots?
Hi vanillasupreme, cute name. It's too bad he doesn't trust you but that's NOT your fault. It's not your fault he's insecure. It's not your fault he can't trust you. Pretend you were in his shoes, would you reacted that way? If my boyfriend have done that, I wouldn't think he was cheating on me, I would believe what he told me. I trust him, and he trusts me. I trust him enough to let him sleep naked with another naked woman on the same bed, though I can't think of any situation that would occur in, unless of course if he was an actor which he isn't. He didn't complain when I use to sleep over at my guy friend's house along with my other guy friends. He didn't tell me he feel uncomfortable about the fact I slept on his bed with a bunch of guys around because he's never met my guy friends. But he said he trust me and just be careful. I assured him, he was a good guy, I know him for a long time and he let me sleep in his bed while he slept somewhere else. I later introduced him to all my guy friends to let him see what kind of guys there were.
If my boyfriend was insecure and didn't trust me, he would of flipped out, we would of argued and broken up. You need trust in a relationship. If something bothers you, let the other person know and try to come to a compromise. Your FOB didn't handle the situation properly. If he doesn't trust you now, I don't see why he can learn to trust you in the future. But because he's your FOB, and will always be part of your life. For the sake of your child, try to get some professional help. Considering this isn't your first breakup and there is a trust issue. Try seeing a couple's counselor. They can help with the problems in your relationship and may even make your relationship stronger. If you tried that and did everything you can and things aren't getting better, then you have to accept that it's just not meant to be. Try to maintain a friendship with him so you can open your heart to someone who is better suited for you.
Don't stress, it's not good for the baby. Things will work out for the best, it may not be exactly what you want though but will be for the best. If you think it is best for you and your baby to keep a relationship with him, then explain to him how you feel and try to find a counselor to help with your relationship. You should be able to find one within the network of your insurance. If you are in school, there should be counselors available to you. I remember in my college, my tuition covered for visits to meet with counselors on my campus. I remember seeing 2 differnet counselors there, I'm not sure if they helped me or not but I felt better after seeing them. It doesn't hurt to try. I wish you the best of luck and congradulations on your little miracle.