Am I actually doing OK or am I in denial
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| Sun, 01-13-2008 - 10:36pm |
Hi all. I had posted about my breakup a couple weeks ago. He left me after 3 years of him leaving and coming back maybe 5 times. Each time I wanted him to come back so bad and he eventually would. I cant completely say that I dont want him to come back again, but I'm not sure.
I'm actually doing OK. But it could be due to a few factors... a great friend of mine is doing her best to keep me busy and lets me talk about it whenever I need to. I've been IMing with a coworker of mine that was interested in me before the breakup every night which makes me feel wanted and good about myself. I hang out with him some, but I dont want a relationship with him. He's been a great guy to talk to. Also there is a guy thats a friend of a friend that I've hung out with a couple times. I kinda had a crush on him before my breakup and now I've hung out with him a few times with other friends though.
So my question is, am I in denial that he wont be coming back. I do have a little bit of hope that'll he'll come back to me. I think of it everyday. But there is also a side of my mind that is telling me that I'm better off without him. He was verbally abusive and had no ambition for his life. Maybe I just get lonely because I'm so used to him being around. Its just hard because he has been my best friend for 10 years. I've had moments of weakness. I've texted him twiced and sent an email to him. He hasnt responded to either. Is it possible that I'm forcing myself to hang on to him to hang on to the past and not go on with my life and venture into the unknown.

Hi Marcie,
Well, it could be denial since in 3 yrs he's left 5 times and kept coming back. Maybe you expect him to come back so it keeps you from having to deal with that it may really be over.
Just embrace how you feel when you feel it, but remember it requires on action on your part even when you are uncomfortable (action meaning calling him or contacting him). The action you take is to write about it, cry about it, vent about, be distracted, pamper yourself.
Hi nicole,
I realize the account you posted is inactive, but I'm still going to ask you to go back into your post and edit it out before the powers that be do it for you. Hate when they do that. ;-)
Anyway, you can email each other through the profiles you set up on iVillage when you created your accounts. Just click on the person's screen name and it gives you that option if the other person has activated that option. You can add that option anytime.
Plus, it's not necessarily a safe thing to post your personal email for the whole world to see. Did someone say spam? ;-)
Thanks and have a great day!