Am I ready to move on?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-10-2007
Am I ready to move on?
2
Wed, 05-30-2007 - 11:57pm
I have been through this too many times- I don't want to get hurt again. I ran into someone I knew 20 yrs. ago and I am doing some freelance work for him now. He is soo cute and nice- but going through a divorce and- this is the weird part- still living w/ his wife. He asked me if I would like to go out sometime and we discussed his situation and left it at "we'll talk about that later". I am very attacted to him and we have so much in common so part of me thinks that when the divorce is final I'd like to date him..... but,I am scared. I enjoy working with him and our conversations and meetings always drag on- because I know there is a mutual feeling there- we like each other, but I am scared that if and when we do get together outside of the secure/business area- that I will again get hurt. It is such a cliche- I never thought I'd feel this way but the last break -up left me very hurt and confused and now I am afraid to trust my feelings. I am afraid to be his "first" date after marriage- his "rebound". I tell myself that everything happens for a reason- that just because he will be newly divorced doesn't mean he will throw me to the curb in a few months- but I still don't know if I am ready. What do you all think?? I'd appreciate any comments or advice.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 12:56pm

a6718...

Pianoguy is NEGATIVE when it comes to dating someone who is still married or even separated!

The man who is interested in you can come up with every excuse in the book...but you're still "the other woman!" You might be a NICE DIVERSION for him and he might have feelings for you that are stronger than those he has for his ALMOST EX?

But the plain and simple truth is....HE'S STILL MARRIED TO HER!

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2007
Thu, 05-31-2007 - 1:36pm
I read your message with interest, as I have just gone through heartbreak with a similar guy. He, too, was living with his wife when I met him - said he was getting a divorce. He eventually moved in with me 5 yrs ago, but has never divorced his wife because he doesn't like to let go. He didn't want to let me go either, when he met someone else, but I have had to get angry and push him out of my life.
I don't know if your guy will be similar, but part of the 'not letting go' is all about control!
Just be careful, and I wish you all the best.