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| Wed, 08-25-2004 - 5:49pm |
These "break up to make up, then break up again" posts have really helped to keep me rooted in reality, and I now accept that I'm in his past, as he is in mine. I was feeling bad about enforcing the NC rule (3 weeks strong, but hurting still). I miss him, but now I REALLY accept the fact that we're not getting back together, and if he calls, it will only be because of guilt (and who needs that?). For the record, he hasn't called me either. We have spoken only once (1 week after the ax) and he told me he had been thinking of me, but didn't call sooner because he wanted to respect my feelings, and my NC rule! I'm sure my not calling or emailing him has made this the cleanest break he has ever experienced!
Over these last few days, I wanted to call so bad (for what I have no idea), but by hearing his voice, laughing at his jokes, and pretending that I'm his friend, I will only be picking at "still open" wounds.
Judging from your posts (and what I know from experience as well), the dumpers tend to move on rather quickly (some may have already started the process while we were in the relationships with them). The less I know about his life, the better at this point. The last time he heard my voice, I was strong and positive. One day, hopefully soon, I'll catch up to my mask.
Posting here helps me in some odd way. I don't know any of you, but I look forward to reading your stories and sharing my own.
Thanks again for the reality check!
-Izuri

You sound like a strong, wise person and I'm sure you will get through this and heal and be ready for a new (and BETTER!) relationship.
Take care!