Bad Dreams

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-08-2007
Bad Dreams
4
Mon, 06-11-2007 - 10:51am
Ok it's been 2 months now since my ex broke up with me, and obviously I was devastated. I'm still in love with him now, and would give anything to have him back, but I'm doing my best to try and move on. The thing is, while I can try and distract myself during the day and not think about him as much, I've just recently started dreaming about him and it's horrible because I can't control that. I've started to dread going to bed because my dreams hurt so much. The most common one is that he asks me back and we start again, and I'm so happy. It seems so real. When I wake up and realise it was just a dream it feels like a kick in the stomach. I had that one again last night, woke up and cried my eyes out. I don't know what to do, I miss him so much and these dreams hurt me so much.
Em xx
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2005
In reply to: littlehiltsy
Mon, 06-11-2007 - 11:34am

I know how you feel. I had a dream about my ex last night. We were still together. I asked him if he loved me and he said no. I asked him if he ever loved me and he said yes...but not anymore. I started throwing things at him and yelling. I woke up feeling so alone.

I hate that dreams can awaken deep emotions that you might not have during the daytime. I have no advice but just wanted to let you know that I can absolutely relate. This is normal after a breakup, perhaps even healthy, and for me they always eventually go away.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-08-2007
In reply to: littlehiltsy
Mon, 06-11-2007 - 11:42am
Hey elanneh,
thanks for your response, I'm glad I'm not the only one going through this. It just hurts so much! The other night I dreamed we were still together, and as I woke up, half asleep I swear I heard someone breathe in and the duvet tugged as someone rolled over in bed. I rolled over and so expected to see him lying beside me, even though it's been 2 months now. It makes me cry everytime, and it seems so unfair! It's so cruel. I miss him so much.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2007
In reply to: littlehiltsy
Tue, 06-12-2007 - 12:07pm

I have had a couple of dreams about my ex. The one that really got to me the most was just a couple of days ago. In the dream we were walking down the street. He said he wanted to start going on to dating sites to find someone. I jumped in front of him and looked him in the face, (he didn't look very good, pale, washed out) and said that I wanted to date him, that I had always liked him. He gave me this sad, pitiful little smile and said he didn't like me that way. Talk about being crushed in real life and in your dreams.
I kind of saw it as a sign. He wasn't into me in real life or dreaming. It was very upsetting for me. I don't know how much stock I would put into it though. It's just deep emotions coming out in dreams.
Of course this doesn't help since I learned yesterday from one of his co-workers, my good friend, that he's been playing the rescurer to some new girl at work. Harmless or not it was like being punched in the stomache.

Try writing down all that you are feeling, sometimes it keeps you from dreaming about it. That way you get it all out of your head.

Sorry you are now a memeber of the broken hearts club.....

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-24-2003
In reply to: littlehiltsy
Tue, 06-12-2007 - 2:02pm
I was going through the same thing when my ex blindsided me with a break-up last November. Those first couple of months I dreamt about him a lot--some dreams we get back together, others we fight about the break-up. These dreams are normal and are all part of the break-up process. They will ease with time--I promise. Now it's been almost 7 months and I can't remember the last time I had a dream about him.