Being the rebound girl
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Being the rebound girl
| Mon, 10-31-2005 - 6:10pm |
In January I started to date a guy I have admired from afar for 10 years. In June he told me he loved me, told his ex about us and asked if he could move in with me as he needed to move out of his friend's apartment. The following week however, he mentioned that he decided to move into his ex's house and wouldn't met with me to explain.Over the summer I had minimal contact with him due to significant life stressors (forced job reassignment and cancer diagnosis). As the weeks past, he continued to maintain contact with me saying that he was only renting from his ex and that they were not back together. Come September I was extremely busy at work. His contact with me increased as did his flirting (the last few months all contact has been intiated by him.) Yesterday he laid a bombshell on me. He said that he was back with his ex although things aren't really clear, he said that was just how things were with them but when i asked why he has been contacting me he said it was because he loved me.(He and is ex has been together on and off for 4 years.She has often cheated on him and wasn't there for him when he has gone through hard times.) So here is the problem, intellectually I know I should run but my heart tells me to stay help.

In my opinion, this is one of those situations where you should listen to your head and not your heart. This guy sounds like a toxic bachelor. He doesn't seem to have his life in order at all... Why not hold out for a guy who can afford his own housing? It isn't a matter of finding a rich guy or being a gold digger or anything, it's about being self-sufficient, which this guy clearly isn't.
I think you need to regard yourself a little higher... why would you hold on to someone who doesn't seem to want you? You deserve a self-sufficient guy who wants you! Why put up with a guy who can't even manage his own affairs? You've probably got more than enough on your plate. Worry about yourself and forget this guy!
That's just my 2 cents!
-Nikki
co-cl of Breaking Up is Hard to Do!
Follow your head..why prolong the heartache..this man is a rollercoaster..you are living your life around his whims..
Best of luck..
Carrie