betrayed after 6 years together
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| Sat, 07-15-2006 - 4:25pm |
My fiancee and i were together for almost 6 years..we had our ups and downs but sticked together. We got engaged very early in our relationship when both of us were young and immature. Because of this we did not know how to handle fights or arguments which kind of left bad taste in our relationship over time.
recently my fiancee went on a vacation to different country. i found out that he started seeing somebody there. when i confronted he said he was confused and needed time to think..he kept saying he loves me and didn't want to lose me..it has been extrememyl difficult for me since 5 months..we work in the same city and share an apartment still. i keep saying i am done with him and he keeps insisitng on giving him some time to clear out things with the other person
i want to give him ultimatum and ask him to once and for all leave me alone..i just need to be strong enough and ready for that..
meanwhile everday is passing with more confusion and pain for me

Hello, I just got dumped after 6 years. The way I look at your situation, you can do one of two things:
1. Dump him - you shouldn't have to live with such turmoil, you deserve better than that.
2. Stay with him until he dumps you for this other woman, or some other person, which will happen, because if he was that in love with you, he wouldn't be interested in other people to begin with.
I know how painful this is, I have been going through the same thing for the past year of my 6 year live-in relationship which just recently ended. In the long run, anyone who gets involved with someone else while in a relationship with you, doesn't love you the way they should, and you are the one who will ultimately bear the pain whether you dump him first, or live with his indecisiveness until he leaves you for someone else.
Better that you end the relationship BEFORE you lose all of your dignity.
Good Luck!
Hi
thanks for your message and concern..
I have been calling it off ever since i found out..right now we are not together officially (however we are for our families)..
also the living situation makes moving on a little hard..but i have given him ultimatum to move out as soon as he is better financially..
meanwhile he acts like evrything is peacy and we are on a break or something..in my mind we are not we are done.
honestly i don't know what he wants from me, he wants to clear out his confusion he keeps saying but he doens't make any effort in doing that..
when he is sweet to me and stuff i waver on my decision and start going into the illusion that maybe there is a chance but then i am brought to harsh reality when i see him talking with the other person..
its been a hell..its like i am trapped in this situation..i lost touch with my close friends so i don't have anyone to talk to either..
i am hoping to get through this period soon
Betrayal is a horrible thing to have to experience in a relationship, I'm very sorry about that.
Hi, me again :)
Hi Sandra
Thanks a lot for your reply..i really needed to hear concerned and caring words..
i know that i need to be firm and start my getting over and healing process..but honestly i don't know if i will ever trust anyone again..my ex was the most trustworthy person at least i thought so...
i will post some more when i am more composed emotionally..
thanks again for ur message