bitter
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| Fri, 07-23-2004 - 7:14pm |
I'm at an in between stage right now. I have no idea how long it could be before he could be ready to give it another try (if ever). I hate how there are no guarantees about anything. I don't know if I should just completely let him go and see what happens. I am surviving life without him but am not happy about it. These past few days I have been incredibly bitter. I'm mad at him for giving up. I'm mad at myself for giving so much of myself to him, only to have him tell me he doesn't want me right now. I'm mad that I trusted him with my heart and he hurt me this much. I'm just plain mad. I guess I'm in that angry state, and I don't like being this way. I hate having such negative feelings about him, and I don't know why all the sudden I feel this way. I've been having my sad days and my strong days, but today I'm just angry and bitter.
My problem is that his birthday is tomorrow. I know he would be upset and hurt if I didn't call him, but I just have such negative feelings toward him right now and I think it would be best for me not to speak to him until this passes. We have been on good terms, I'm just in this schlump right now and I don't know why. Any advice? Should I call him tomorrow??
| Fri, 07-23-2004 - 9:00pm |
