Breaking Up SUCKS

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
Breaking Up SUCKS
2
Sun, 04-17-2005 - 8:13pm

I am having trouble getting thru my break up.......

Grant it - it just happened 2 weeks ago. Basically, my BF of 4 yrs broke up with me because I am white, he is arabic, and he has now decided (after years of telling me otherwise) that his family will never accept me and he needs to do what is best for them.

My problem - how to I communicate or not communicate to get over this? When he first broke up with me 2 weeks ago, it was online, and I tried to be understanding to what he was going thru with his family. After our conversation, I felt I was too understanding, started to feel my broken heart, and began to text message him and call him crying and pleading for him to not do this.

Then, I got angry - so I emailed him and yelled at him and cried and said horrible things to him out of my frustration for the situation. Then yesterday, I stopped by his house to tell him that I only said the nasty things I did out of frustration and that I hope we could be friends one day and I understand that this is how it has to be.

I now have the desire to send him another email..... When is enough enough for communication? When can u just let it go?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-2004
Mon, 04-18-2005 - 12:21pm
You've crossed the line of enough and are beginning to verge on stalking. The break up rule of "No Contact!" is the only thing that will be at all helpful to you. You've got to distance yourself from him and the you that you've allowed yourself to become over the last four years. No contact is the only way you'll begin to regain some of the self worth you've forfieted to him and to rebuild your own life, to figure out who you are. YOU, the real you, not the you you've become. Good luck and don't look back!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2004
Mon, 04-18-2005 - 4:52pm

Thank you...

I am doing my best: I took him out of my cellphone, erased my log of calls, blocked him on my buddy list, and now use a different grocery store in order to avoid any possible unexpected run-ins.....

We'll see how this goes!