Can anyone help me with this?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2007
Can anyone help me with this?
2
Tue, 04-17-2007 - 11:07am

Hello everyone! I am new to this board, and have been reading some posts from other members, and it seems as though we are all in similar situations. However, my story is different in that I am not dealing with a recent breakup.

I have been apart from my ex for 10 months now and I am just now starting to feel the heartache. He broke up with me over the phone after we had dated for 6 years. He told me that he wasn’t happy anymore, and that was it. He hasn’t called to give more explanation, or apologize. Even though we broke up that long ago, in the back of my mind I wasn’t worried because I knew he was going to come back like he has in the past (we’ve broken up once before; it was mutual.) But last week I realized it was actually over.

Last week I heard from a friend that my ex is dating a girl that I went to school with, a girl that I did not get along with (who just got divorced in March.) My friend told me that this girl stays at his house all the time, and she says stuff like, “I’m just so happy with him!” and “I can see myself with him for a long time! I love him so much!” She just got divorced for crying out loud, how can she be in love with someone else this quick? Especially someone she just met. (She is 21, a year younger than me, and my ex is 23)Of course no one likes to hear that an ex is with someone new, but the fact that it’s someone I don’t like hurts even worse for some reason.

I have been dealing with this break-up in the normal healthy way up until now. Now I want to scream and yell at him for replacing me with her! It feels like they are both doing this out of spite. I am heartbroken all over again. I always felt that he would fight for me a little, or at least apologize for hurting me so bad. But he has moved on without any remorse. I want him to be happy I just didn’t think he would be happy this fast, and without acknowledging anything he did to me.

My heart hurts so bad.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Tue, 04-17-2007 - 2:50pm

Welcome to the board twinkles_2005,


Sometimes grief takes us by surprise and what you feel is normal upon hearing that he's dating. Journal write to vent how you feel. Write an UNSENT letter to him, telling him how you feel about how he's moved on, how fast, etc. then burn it.


If he's not over it, hasn't healed before getting involved, she's the rebound, but that's not

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2007
Sat, 04-21-2007 - 8:30pm

***UPDATE***
Apparently my ex and this girl are now engaged. I got a random "blog invitation" from one of her friends (who doesn't like me either) that says how gorgeous "the ring" is that my ex and this girl picked out, and how glad she is that she will have another married couple to hang out with. She ends the blog with, "congrats you guys!" I am almost positive that this is a lie and intentionaly created to hurt me.

They have only been together for 1 1/2 months!

I know that I shouldn't be concerned with what he's doing and everything , but this is so hard for me to believe! Not to mention, disapointing.

Engaged? After knowing eachother only a month? Could this just be a trap they set out to hurt me? My ex knows how to get to me...




Edited 4/21/2007 8:32 pm ET by twinkles_2005