Can I do this?
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Can I do this?
| Thu, 11-15-2007 - 4:38pm |
I posted a couple weeks ago (diff board.) about some relationship problems that I am having. I've been struggling with myself over whether or not to end it. 5 1/2 years is a long time. I've decided that I need to do what's best for myself, even if I still love him. It's not fair that I drag things out and lead him on. He doesn't deserve that, and neither do I. My big problem is actually having "The talk." I tried to last night, but chickened out. I've never had to do something like this before. This fork in the road is the hardest decision I've ever had to make. (some say I'm very lucky for that.) How do I do this? How do I hurt someone I love? How do I explain my reasons for leaving to someone who really won't understand? Sometimes, I feel defeated. I fought for this relationship for so long, told everyone else they were wrong, and that we were meant to be. I felt strongly about it up until the past year. I still love him, and I don't want to break his heart. But I feel that if I don't do this, I will regret it for the rest of my life. (There's also the possibility of regretting the breakup, however the magnitude is less.) Have any of you ladies ever had to do this? Can anyone give me any kind of advice? I articulate myself better in writing...I was thinking of jotting down my feelings and then reading him the letter face to face, or having him read it in front of me....How do you break someone's heart?

Welcome to the board goddessmel25,
It's very hard to end a relationship, no matter what you feel or how you present it, it's not going to be easy.
**Update**
I did it yesterday. We were on the phone (which I didn't want, but it just happened). He was pissed...but he made it even easier...claiming that i'll never be happy, and i should just stick with what i have....told him that i would wish him happiness no matter if it was with me or without me because I love him.. He didn't get it at all, and said some things that really helped me along and made me realize it was the right decision.
I feel good, and i feel bad for feeling so good....but it's the way it has to be.
Next stop: Pacific Northwest