can it happen

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2004
can it happen
Thu, 12-23-2004 - 2:31pm

HI ladies,

I need to know if it can happen. Where two people who were going out, suffer a break-up, can those people get back together successfuly? I have always been a sceptic, believing that once its done, its done. If it was meant to be, you wouldnt have broken up and whatnot. But now i question it. Our situation is highly unique as we met online and talked for about 3 months. Then we met on my turf 3000 kms away. We drove accross the country together to his turf. Me = Big city, him=small town. Our relationship didnt last because we were so stressed out by the little things, i feel we never gave ourselves a fair chance. I blame myself a lot for the outcome, as i was very unhappy and miserable. Anyways, we broke up and were both miserable for 3 weeks at which point i moved out and into my own place in the same town. After that, we became closer and more intimate than we had ever been. This was incredibly hard to deal with. I decided to move back home. it was a very emotional time for both of us. We seem to have had the thought that even though we were saying goodbye, that it wasnt for good, i think we both have a thought that we have seperate issues to deal with, and that when we are more complete people, we will be able to sustain and be responsible for something as precious as a great relationship.I had been gone from him for 3 weeks; 2 weeks in another town before coming home and then at home for a week when one night we were talking (we talked at least every 2 days, if not every day) and i asked if he thought it would be a good idea if we didnt talk for a while. He said no and asked if i thought it would help. I didnt answer, he had to go to get to bed. We havent spoken since, its been a week. I know this is getting long so let me cut short. we were together for 9 months. We have been broken up for 3 and i am still very much in love with him. I stopped the comunication because i believed that thats what had him all tense the night he called me. My mom, who is not rich by any means, said that she would help me buy a ticket back there, i recently won one of those roll up the rim coffee cups, it was a hundred dollars of a travel package, the weather here sucks. Does this all make sense, am i reliving what all women live thru a break-up or could there be more? does that happen at all? I should mention that yes i have been in relationships before, but not good ones mind you, so being with someone who actually treated me well was a stressor in our relationship. as far as my past break ups, i never wanted them at all like this cause i was mostly relieved they were out of my life
thank you :)