Can't let go or forget...help!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-26-2003
Can't let go or forget...help!!!
3
Fri, 04-29-2005 - 4:10am

August 2004 my ex and I had broken up...I was having a hard time getting over him and none of the guys I was meeting we interesting to me. In December I met this guy and he just blew me away! It was amazing! For one month he and I dated but in January he told me that he didn't like me the way I liked him, etc. A bunch of other garbage. Just thinking about how he said that still hurts me and makes me want to cry.

Yes, I have a friend with benefits whom I met a week after this guy broke it off with me and I like my friend with bens enough to have sex with him but nothing more. 3 months later I am not over this guy!

How do I forget aboout him? When I see him I become sad and think about what could have been and how he just made me so happy! When I see him with other girls or think about him with other girls I also become sad.

I'm worried about not meeting someone who will make me feel that way again...and if I do I'm afraid I will just get my heart broken again.

I'm typing this and crying because I'm sad...I still like him soooo much but I just need to forget about him and it's hard.

Help me!

I also know that he and I were only dating for a month, but he just blew me away and I'm not usually blown away like that or met someone like that.....

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2005
Fri, 04-29-2005 - 11:14am

I'm sorry you are feeling so awful. I know that most of us who are going through breakups feel the same way - that we will never meet someone who makes us feel the way our ex did. If we didn't feel that way we wouldn't be so upset in the first place. Even if we don't feel that way now, we have to believe (based on what so many people who have gone through the same thing tell us) that there is someone else out there.

After only one month of dating, you saw only the best this guy had to offer. In the beginning of a relationship, everyone is on their best behavior. Maybe that's why this is so hard right now - everything seemed perfect. But no relationship, even the best ones, are perfect.

I don't know if the friends with benefits situation is keeping you from meeting other guys or having a real relationship. If so, that could be keeping you stuck in this place longer than you have to be. I don't know, just a thought.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2005
Sun, 05-01-2005 - 6:39pm

i totally know where you're coming from

i broke up with an a$$hole boyfriend because i met an amazing guy.... perfect on paper, hot, successful, nice, funny, the whole 9.... our friends even hooked us up bc they thought we'd b great together... we started seeing each other, things were great..... all the sudden, he tells me he doesnt think thigns are working out..... there's no "spark"....... it blew me away! only a month had passed, how could he assess so quickly........ plus, i liked him and was having a great time..... now my a$$hole bf turned over a new leaf and wants me back and has changed... but all i could think about it is this guy who broke it off...... i just cant understand why....... its drivign me crazy..... i know i shouldnt' care but i cant help it...... i know it was only a short time to spend together and better end things now than continue on just because..... but its driving me crazy!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2004
Mon, 05-02-2005 - 10:12pm
I'm sorry to hear about the pain you're going through.
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