Confused and heartbroken??

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2005
Confused and heartbroken??
1
Sun, 03-06-2005 - 1:07am

I was recently dumped by a guy I dated for 4 months. This doesn't seem like a long time, but I truly thought we may be together forever and was falling in love with him. All of the sudden, I was blindsided when he broke up with me. He said that he just wasn't sure if this was a time in his life where he could have a serious relationship. He is 25 and in his first year of law school, I am about to graduate. He immediately tried to be my friend and would still flirt and tell me how he missed me and all of that, but he just didn't have time. After this went on for a week, I asked him to leave me alone so I could get over it. He did for the most part, but I still had to see him around school and in the social scene.

Now after a month, we saw each other out and spent the night together, thanks to alcohol. Of course, he said how he missed me and all of that. This was last night. And, it obviously makes everything more confusing because its obvious he still really cares about me, he said so himself. But, still he's not with me, I don't get it.

I realize this is probably all bull and I just need to get over it. But, that's the problem, I can't. I feel like we are meant for each other and I don't understand why he couldn't give us a chance. I honestly wonder if the "I can't handle a relationship" excuse is actually true or if its just realizes that I'm not the one for him. It would almost be easier if that was the case, then i wouldn't wonder why if someone cares about me so much, they "can't" be with me???

At this point I don't know what to do. Does it sound like there is any hope for us? Would it help to try and talk to him again? Or, should I just let it go? Should I be his friend or not?




Edited 3/6/2005 1:23 am ET ET by linds2177
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-04-2005
Sun, 03-06-2005 - 3:43am
I would talk to him about it and ask him if he cares so much why dont he try working on a relationship with you. I know how you feel because Im going through a situation similar to yours. And I feel like me and him belong together so I still try and work things out so talk to him and find out what exactly he wants and where you stand with him in his life and if he dont want a relationship then stay away from him so you'll can take the time to get over him.