confused!! plz help!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-22-2006
confused!! plz help!
2
Sun, 01-14-2007 - 1:04am

Hello, im kind of new here, been lurking around for awhile now.. i'veonly posted one other discussion which is now null due to the following lol....

Heres the story...

I met my boyfriend about 7 months ago and we hit it off right away, im not exactly sure when we officaly started dating cuz it was a gradual thing it was hard to tell. well I had concerns from the get go (age difference, different experience levels) he kept assuring me that those things didnt matter to him, and that they shouldnt matter to me either as long as we both like each other.. so eventually i got over them, things moved really fast and really well. until about a month ago, he said he wasnt sure what he wanted but knew he didnt want to hurt me so we kind of cooled things off a bit, and just remained 'friends' we would hang out and it would always lead to one thing... sex. after awhile i had assumed that we were dating again, his comments made it seem that way. just recently he completely stoped taking my calls and calling me. I dont understand this last time we seen each other it was great... now my question is do i just leave it be? stop calling? or do i deserve a reason for his sudden change of heart? I dont know if i can just leave it be, i am so crazy about this guy, hes all i think about from the time i wake up to the time i go to bed...i cant stop crying i just miss him so bad. i could really use some advice or just some kind words. I really think i deserve an explanation at the very least my only concern is it will make it harder to deal with if i hear the words i know hes going to speak??
thanks in advance for any suggestions

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-10-2006
Sun, 01-14-2007 - 10:57am
Dear Sara...I understand your condition and of course you deserve explanation.You can forget about your pride and write him neutral email asking him to explain what is going on telling him you want nothing from him but juts to understand him as far as you had 7 months of relationships. As for his reasons to treat you this way, I guess he just broke with you cause of some reasons. As he said befor, he doesnt know what he wants..so it looks like he is quite complicated person. Good Luck
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2007
Sun, 01-14-2007 - 11:35am
Of course you deserve an explaination. You were probably great to him, of course you were, you really care about him. And he shouldnt have treated you the way he did. Or the way he is. There is no harm in e mailing him and asking what you did wrong, if he has the decency to answer you then thats great, and if he doesnt, then he is probably not worth it at all. Just remember not to blow it out or proportion. He probably has reasons, like he said, he doesnt know what he wants. He could possibly be just as confused as you are right now, and doesnt know what hes doing. If you really need to know, ask. You have a right to know. But just stay strong, and if it doesnt work out, then it wasnt meant to be. You`ll be okay sweetheart, just stay strong.