Define "The One"???

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2007
Define "The One"???
4
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 8:57pm

It seems that everyone in here is breaking up with "the one".

Missy
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2003
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 9:39pm

someone simply said to me that you can not your "dream guy" until that guy has met his "dream girl"


it sucks but it's true.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2007
Mon, 01-28-2008 - 11:55pm

In my personal opinion? There isn't one. Or like you said, you won't know until you're 150 and looking back on your life. Then maybe you can venture a guess at who was the one and who wasn't.

What I DO believe in is that there are people I'm willing to try to build a life with. And unfortunately sometimes people you want very much to build a future with don't feel the same way. Which explains this whole board to begin with.

I mean, not to trivialize the feelings of everyone who has met 'the one'(myself included), but I'd venture a guess that it's a Hollywood phenomenon. Often you (or I) have invested a lot of time, love, and effort on 'the one' only to see it come crashing down. And the feeling of failure just affirms our worthlessness and puts him farther up on 'the one' pedestal. We're so much in love that we're blinded to the idea that he doesn't want to try. Or we feel that because we try so hard, he should want to try as hard too. And unfortunately neither of those are true. I mean, bottomline really, is that often a relationship with 'the one' that went down the drain has nothing to do with you, and everything to do with the other person NOT WANTING TO TRY with you because you weren't 'the one' for him. And frankly that's his loss. Truly.

And I'm not pulling this out of nowhere either. I had an 6-7 year relationship where I seriously thought I'd met 'the one'. And it stung when he dumped me for his ex girlfriend. Only I have since had many better and more fulfilling relationships. So it's really all a matter of perspective.

Cheers


- There comes a point in your life when you realize who matters, who never did, who won't anymore, and who always will. So don't worry about people from your past - there's a reason they didn't make it into your future.
- There comes a point in your life when you realize who matters, who never did, who won't anymore, and who always will. So don't worry about people from your
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-19-2007
Tue, 01-29-2008 - 7:55am

In my opinion...


'The one' is the person who loves you as completely as you love them.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2005
Tue, 01-29-2008 - 5:44pm

Yeah, I obviously haven't met, "the one" either. My last ex was the, "i thought." :)