did i do the right thing?
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| Thu, 08-25-2005 - 10:01pm |
I just broke up with my b/f of 2 1/2years last night.
We had a discussion about our future and he said that loves me and want to spend the rest of his life with me but he wants to experience the single carefree life that he never had before he go ahead with the marriage life with me.
Here is a little background about him... All his life he has been taking care and being respondsible for others... his family and siblings, he went through alot and always felt a tremendous burden on him. Also before me, he was in a long term relationship for 8 years that he felt stucked and wanted to get out for years. He said that he wish we met little later on in his life after he get everything out of his system. At the sametime he told me that he is willing to try to get the experience with me by his side because he doesn't want to lose me, it might just take longer for us to get there. I thought to myself and told him that I would never want him to regret being with me 5, 10 years down in the line and have the feeling of missing out on the life experience that he long for, so I broke up with him and told him that we can try again when his got over his "itche", when he is ready to commit and if I m still available.
Just to make this clear, I m 100% sure that his "itche" has nothing to do with wanting to check out other girls, he loves me and I trust him. It is mainly about his freedom ..him doing whatever he wants and not to have to worry about me or "report" to me about his whereabouts. Him experiencing being "lonely" and all the sorrow that single life brings that he had never experienced. Thats why I thought that the best thing is just for us to break up right now.
I plan to be with him, he is the love of my life and I feel that I m actually helping him to fall in love me more by leaving him. I know that this is a very risky move but I think it is better for us in the long run. My heart is aching but I m not going to call him at all for these first 2 weeks. I know he is going to call me and I plan to just make it short and sweet. Still I fear for the worst, there is always that "what if" possiblity. I am also worried that I was a fool by breaking up with him since he already said that he is willing work it out his "itche" with me by his side.... I need all the support I can get or any advice that would be helpful. I know that if we are meant to be we are going to end up getting back together no matter what. I hope I did the right thing... thanks for listening.

hi,
i think you did the right thing by letting him go and sow his royal oats. i know its definitely not the easiest decision but it was a wise one. men need to do this in order to grow and mature and his reasons are completely understandable and justified.
i wish you all the luck in the future and keep us posted. btw-i wouldn't exactly wait around for him either while he's "finding" himself, i would be trying to find myself.