domestic squabbling
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| Sat, 09-25-2004 - 10:08am |
i'm new to this board, and wanted some advice about what to do about my situation.
I have been married for 15 years, and my husband and I have two daughters aged 16 and 13. A few months ago i found out my husband had been cheating on me, and so moved to my sister's house. my sister has two daughters of her own, and a live-in boyfriend that did not father her daughters. the past few months have been pure hell living with her, but i have nowhere to go right now.
the thing is that our eldest daughters do not get along, and this puts friction between my sister and i over how to raise them. the girls are constantly fighting both verbally and physically, with the faceslap as the dispute settler. I don't think a week has gone by in over four months in our house where one of us has not slapped the other. it started off between the elder girls, spread to the younger girls and now has spread to occuring between my sister and i.
Just the other day my sister got mad at my daughter, and my daughter slapped her, my sister slapped her back, so my sister slapped her again, my daughter slapped her back YET again, and then I stepped in and my sister slapped me, and so I slapped her, and then she slapped me back again before her boyfriend grabbed her hand. This type of thing is a common occurence and happens at least once a week when disagreements don't get resolved. After all the faceslapping it seems everything cools off after a while, and it so remains as a viscious cycle of tension between us, verbal outletting and then
SLAP..... SLAP SLAP.....SLAP.......... SLAP SLAP SLAP separate and don't talk for the rest of the day. UGH - just driving me nuts!
I feel bad for my sister's boyfriend as he must be sick and tired of living with a house full of fighting women and girls. My husband begs me to move back with him, but I can't bear even looking at him, even though he said he hasn't seen the other woman for three months. I don't know whether to believe him. He has shown up here several times, and is upset that my sister and I and our daughters are not getting along, and says all the troubles will go away if me and the girls just move back with him. I can't take it and just tell my sister's boyfriend to make him go away.
I've tried to punish my daughters for slapping, but I think it's both my sisters and my fault. We were raised in a household ourselves where the women unfortunately settled disputes by slapping the other girls face.
Has anyone ever had this situation - know how to stop the cycle of faceslapping?
I don't know what to do about my husband either as I can't conceive of living with him, can't afford to move out on my own, but can't deal with the female faceslapping in our house of six women and one guy constantly trying to break it up.
Any ideas what to do?
Laine.
| Wed, 09-29-2004 - 12:33pm |
| Thu, 09-30-2004 - 11:55pm |

