Don't know how to feel
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| Sat, 11-04-2006 - 5:07pm |
My ex called me for the first time since a week after our breakup. He called at work and we don't have caller ID so I answered. No one ever calls me at work except my ex-husband. But it was him and he wanted to know if I knew how many people work at the factory my dad works in. He's a reporter and I know that he knew I wouldn't have a clue. So, part of me thinks he wanted an excuse to call. I had just broke NC yet again with a very stupid e-mail that I wish I hadn't sent. I had been doing really well but I completly crashed again. He responded to the e-mail telling me how sad he was that the love of a good woman was going to waste and that he knew that I would say that it didn't have to go to waste and he was still working on that. Whatever, I know he's with someone else! So I just feel weird. Part of me is still really sad and I still miss him and want him back. Part of me is also really confused by it all.
On top of that, I've met someone who seems really nice. I want to give him a chance, but I'm scared. Scared I'll like him, scared my ex will come back, scared I won't like anyone as much as my ex! I'm just scared of my life right now!

It seems that you're not over your EX yet. You fear that he comes back...why? Accept that it's over and that he's got a woman now. His contact to your office may have been a desire to get his ego boosted..he knows you still love him. I'd ignore his e-mails, calls, text messages and such. His words and presence in your life are preventing you from moving on.
As for getting involved with another man, I wouldn't recommended. You're not emotionally healthy and can't give 100% to the relatiosnhip. That wouldn't be fair to him. In a few months you'll be breaking up with him.
Work on yourself first to become emotionally healthy, a strong woman. Get over your EX. Then you'll be prepared to date again.