dont know what to do please help!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-21-2007
dont know what to do please help!
4
Wed, 02-21-2007 - 10:58pm

so glad i found this site.like all of you im trying to be strong and get over this heartache. my first though every morning is what did i do wrong? what if i had done things a different way whould he still be with me? the point is that i blame my self for most of the things i do know thats wrong but i just cant help it. i miss him so much this is the first time i have felt this way the first time i cant get over a guy quickly. last time we talked i acted like if evrything was good in my life but actually everything is just a front because deep inside im so heartbroken. he was the person i could tell anything 2 and he would know what to say to make everything just right. i always said i would never cry for a guy but never say never right. evrytime he crosses my mind is hard to hold my tears.i miss him so much last time he text me and said he missed me and wanted to see me but i couldnt i couldnt see him it would just cause more pain and that i just cant take it. part of me thou wanst to call him and get together atleast just for lunch but i dont know how it would go. ive actually thought about going out with him and getting all dolled up so he could see what he lost. i dont know i guess this does sound a little childish but i just cant help it.

i would love for anyone to give me advice and help me get things right please dont hold anything back let me know how you feel about this hey if you have to be harsh to get your point across please be so.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Wed, 02-21-2007 - 11:16pm
be strong hun. it gets better! you should look up a few websites about raising self esteem. not because i think you are depressed, but sometimes loving yourself a little more means that you'll stop worrying about him!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-21-2007
Wed, 02-21-2007 - 11:18pm

Hi Denise4727

Here is another great site to gain great ideas from others about relationships, or to speak with others and gain support from others when things go bad in releationships, etc.

The site is by John Gray (Mars and Venus author); the site is:
www.marsvenus.com

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-21-2007
Wed, 02-21-2007 - 11:36pm

Not sure what happen/ history of what caused this break up; however, definitely suggest going to the marsvenus.com website and go to the message board and post under one of the dating topics either "When A Man Pulls Away" or "Dating Ups and Downs" about what caused the breakup and history about your relationship and ask for help. It will take approx. 6 hours to get responses (time for it to post on server and people to respond). I found that when I hurt over a painful situation (like you are) it helps to have an online support group behind you as well as giving you the opportunity to write your feeling down/ out and especially when others respond with supporting words and ideas on what you should do.

However, with the limited amount that I do know about this, I would definitely let him pursue you if he iniated the break up. It did sound like he text messaged you and that is a good sign over all. However, if you are hurting and do not feel comfortable in seeing him, then it is probably best not to. I do believe that he will still try to contact you. And, if you wish to not have this guy totally removed from your life then you probably should (when you're comfortable) text or email him back or what you feel comfortable with doing. Never, chase a guy or contact him out of the blue if he iniated the break up. He needs to realize what you mean to him; and this process of figuring out things often takes between 1 to 3 months.

Hope this helps

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Sat, 02-24-2007 - 1:34pm

Hi Denise and welcome to the board.