dumest woman on earth?
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dumest woman on earth?
| Thu, 06-29-2006 - 11:27am |
I have been living with my boyfriend for over a year now. He has three wonderful daughters that I adore. I moved here from Dallas to be with him. I was only here for two weeks when he started drinking heavily and staying gone for at first one night....then about every month he would dissapear for two or three days and not answer his phone. The last few months it has been an every week thing. Staying gone for two to three days. My birthday was last weekend and he left friday morning and didnt return until Sunday. Completly missing my birthday. Then on Wensday he didnt come home until Thursday night. And when he did he was sobbing...begging forgiveness...asking me to marry him...Im to good for him...etc. Well then I found out on Friday that he had cheated on me...with his ex...whom broke up his marriage...and made it so his kids wouldnt even visit. Then last night he didnt show up until about 11:00p. Now I know what you are thinking ladys. Leave him!! And I know that I need to...and I am in the process of moving out. But my heart doestn want to go. My whole life has been centered around others and what they want. And believe it or not...I dont KNOW HOW to do just for me! Can u ladies pleaseeee give me some wisdom on how to just do me? Thank u

Well I gotta say, after reading your post, the obvious answer is yes, leave him. He's disrespecting you... don't buy into his pleading/crying/begging act. He should've thought about that when he was Mr. No Show all the time.
Of course your heart is still in it; you weren't the one to stray, you were still in the relationship. But now's the time to trust your instincts, listen to your head and be smart. You know you don't want this mess in your life and he doesn't deserve you. A million people will tell you that, but you need to start believing it.
I know what you mean about always doing good for others, but you need to take care of #1 right now. Don't be his doormat. Surround yourself with good friends who can help you with the actual move and transition away from him. READ. There are a lot of good book suggestions that have been posted on this board. See a counselor if you can - they are good just to vent to if nothing else. Don't beat yourself up about the way you feel, take each day as it comes and put one foot in front of the other. You are stronger than you think, you can do this! And keep us posted on your situation :)