dumped but he may want me later

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2006
dumped but he may want me later
2
Tue, 10-24-2006 - 6:27pm

2 days ago my boyfriend of over 3 months broke up with me. He has been getting a lot of pressure from his family to do alcohol rehab and get his act together. He just moved to town and is finding a job and place to live. He definitely is an alcoholic and had asked me to help him drink less once he moved here. His family felt he needed to focus on that without having a girlfriend in the picture I guess (who knows what the best way is). I know he felt he didn't have much to give me and was very preoccupied with getting everything together in his life. I definitely want him to get help and get better (that is the most important thing).

He wants to stay in touch and says maybe when he is better we can go out again. He told me over and over that I was wonderful and nothing but nice to him and an amazing person, blah, blah, blah. I want to be supportive of him through this but I certainly can't be sure we will ever get back together. If I keep talking to him I doubt I would be able to move on. We were really good friends and I'll miss that.

What do I do - just do what is best for me and not have any communication with him?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2006
Tue, 10-24-2006 - 6:43pm

i'm so sorry to hear this...well just respect his decision...maybe his telling you the truth...give him some space to put him self together... anyways i dont think you wanna be with a alcoholic person right? no job or nothing good at all. just imagine if you guys end up together and he didnt change...is that what you want?

good luck

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2006
Wed, 10-25-2006 - 2:55pm

You need to do what you feel like doing. Follow your heart.

My situation is somewhat similar but also very different. I decided to do no contact for a month, then got back in touch with him. We then talked on the phone about every 2 weeks for about 2 months until 3 months ago when we saw eachother for the 1st time since the break. We now see each other about once a week.

Like I said do what is best for you. What you feel you need to do. Only you know yourself and none of us know him or if can truly get his life on track.

If you have any question, please ask. I'll be happy to answer and help in anyway I can.

~Amber