EGH my EX is a flippin moron!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2004
EGH my EX is a flippin moron!
7
Wed, 12-01-2004 - 12:44pm

Alright .. so I've been here before .. LOL .. posted several messages .. the one most recently about my ex of now close to 1.5 months trying to contact me ... well I found out today he told his best friend (whom I'm close to) that if he want's to start dating me, that's it's OK??????? What the hell? First of all .. I wouldn't date his best friend because we are just friends and I don't wanna get involved in anymore drama .. but, why oh why is my ex telling him it's ok to date me? I honestly don't believe that any good could come of that and how is my ex "ok with that?" ... Yes, my ex has a new g/f, but still .. even after I dump someone .. I don't want them to date my close friends .. let alone best friend ... what the hell is going on here? Why would my ex wanna see me with his best friend????? I can't handle all this drama and him popping in and out of my life .. I can't move on completely if he doesn't just get the hell out of my life for good ... do I have to tell him point blank .. "get the hell out of my life!?" ... I haven't talked to him in almost a month and I don't want to either! Thanks for listening!

Lynne

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2004
Wed, 12-01-2004 - 2:48pm
Sounds like he's just trying to show off... he knew it would get back to you... He probably knows that you would never date his/your friend, but by saying that, it was a way for him to declare "I'm over you..." Pretty childish I'd say... men... whatever...
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 12-01-2004 - 3:56pm

Men aren't "territorial" like women.

He figures you were fun adn good at sex........and that maybe you two share interests and pursuits...and so you two would possibly be a good match. Neither of them sound as if they're old enough to be ready to be looking for a relationship....and he figures he had fun dating you - maybe his friend will too.

Erin
quickblade14@hotmail.com

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 12-01-2004 - 5:43pm

You need to tell your friends to stop talking to you about him. That's part of "no contact"...indirect contact (such as friends telling you about him and what he's up to) is still contact.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2004
Wed, 12-01-2004 - 6:30pm

Hi Lynne,

First and foremost, I really liked your title message... Anyhow, your friend might have asked him if it would be alright to date you and your ex might have told him yes, after all, what is he supposed to say? I don't know but it sounds to me like your friend might like you and was also interested in your reaction... But, I do agree with Sheri, things would be much easier if you would not even talk about him with or to anyone. Talking about him only brings him to mind and you need to forget about him completely in order to successfully move on. Just my opinion. Lucy

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-07-2004
Wed, 12-01-2004 - 7:00pm
maybe his friend is the one that wants to date u, so he got it clear from your ex first to see if there culd have been a problem between them if the friend decided to date u
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2004
Thu, 12-02-2004 - 12:39am

Hey .. thanks for all the replies .. I just don't understand how or why my ex could be ok with this? If I dumped someone I didn't have feelings for, I would still not be ok with my friends, let alone BEST friend (who knew a lot about our relationship) dating him! This just doesn't make sense. My ex apparently misses me and the best friend is telling me all this .. like we agreed today that if we wanna be friends, he can't bring up my ex .. but the thing is .. how is that possible? I met his best friend through him, so he's always going to be "there" in some sense. Do I cut off ties with the best friend all together? Damn .. why does this have to complicated? All I wanna do is move on with my life and forget my ex ... he caused me so much pain and I'm starting to move on ... then he tries to contact me last week ... then he tells his best friend he can date me .. are these ways of him trying to stay in my life? Because I don't want him in my life at all .. do I have to just tell him this and get him out of my life for good?? Thanks.

Lynne

Avatar for alsatia23
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 12-02-2004 - 12:59pm

I would imagine it to be more of a control issue.







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