excruciating

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2007
excruciating
15
Mon, 10-15-2007 - 12:17am

It's been three weeks since my bf of three years broke up with me. Long story short: we've been

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2007
In reply to: showtime07
Mon, 10-15-2007 - 1:04am

One more thing: Another fear I have is that he'll fall for someone else. I know it won't happen anytime soon (you can't just forget three years

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
In reply to: showtime07
Mon, 10-15-2007 - 1:17pm

Hi

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
In reply to: showtime07
Mon, 10-15-2007 - 1:26pm

::I had planned to visit him next month (anniversary), and I still have that time off... I know it's not the best thing to do, but I don't know why.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2007
In reply to: showtime07
Mon, 10-15-2007 - 2:06pm

I appreciate your response, and I've visited much of the links (great material, btw).


He told me that the things he's opening up about to his old friends and the new one are issues and problems that I already know about. I still can't help but feel

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
In reply to: showtime07
Mon, 10-15-2007 - 2:15pm

Interesting that he would talk to friends about the issues, open up to them, but shut you out and not go to counseling, that's not a good sign for the relationship overall.


You can post any time you want or need to.... no rules about how much or how often you can vent or rant.





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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2007
In reply to: showtime07
Mon, 10-15-2007 - 2:19pm

Oh, he's definitely gonna do counseling. It's just a matter of setting up appointments and administrative stuff (he just moved to his new place last week). He got the idea from me (last time we were together, we went to see my counselor).


What do you think of the fact that he says the stuff he's telling others is the stuff I already know?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
In reply to: showtime07
Mon, 10-15-2007 - 2:21pm
::What do you think of the fact that he says the stuff he's telling others is the stuff I already know?

I think he's talking to the wrong people to work out the issues.....





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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2007
In reply to: showtime07
Mon, 10-15-2007 - 2:40pm
Yeah. I'm really sad that he's not turning to me much right now. He'll tell me about why he doesn't like his new city or job, or what's in store for his career, but that's about it. He says the major things he wishes to accomplish -- to figure out what type of person he wants to be and seek happiness -- he's doing on his own, by reflecting, spending hours each day writing in a journal, and soon going to a counselor. But the auxiliary issues
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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2007
In reply to: showtime07
Mon, 10-15-2007 - 4:59pm

My counselor has this to say about the trip issue: If I can treat it as a fun, nonserious trip in which we just sightsee and enjoy the city together, then that could be a big plus for our relationship (both as friends now and in the long run). That if I can do so without feeling too torn up about it inside, or without putting any pressure on revisiting the relationship issue, then go for it.


If we

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2006
In reply to: showtime07
Mon, 10-15-2007 - 5:39pm

I responded to your off-line email this morning, but it may have gotten delayed in cyberspace ;)

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