Expect too much from Your Relationship?
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| Wed, 11-14-2007 - 3:12pm |
We all deserve to find people who connect with us, who care for us, who make us laugh, who drive us crazy (in a good way), and who make us feel more excited than a popcorn kernel in a microwave.
Of course, we should all strive for all five qualities, not settle for two or three of the total. That said, many of us have unfair expectations of what relationships are supposed to be like.
Blame it on the movies, or romance novels, or Barbie-and-Ken mythology, but seeking perfection in a relationship isn't noble; it's doomed. Think about the lottery winners: They play with the hope that they'll score big, quit the job, buy a yacht, and party for the rest of their lives.
But the reality for so many mega-bucks winners is that they end up in a dead-end life with relatives clawing at them and bankruptcy lawyers dividing the spoils. Why? Because their expectations of their fantasy life were far different than the reality, and they end up blowing the so-called best thing that ever happened to them.
Same goes for relationships. You may hit lucky sevens with a perfect match, but if you don't manage the fantasy with a dose of reality,

That was me:
"When you start dating someone who drives you to Jack Nicholson levels of craziness, you want total saturation. You want to talk on the phone, you want an inbox full of flirty messages, you want five nights a week of dates, you can't stop thinking about them, and everything you say, do, smell, touch, or eat reminds you of that person."
Today is D-day! :(
4 Weeks of been single, and its been a long day but I have been able to keep myself busy even though my heart still aches and my brain still keeps getting triggered by dumb things. For example today at lunch my sisters,my mom, and I went to this Caribbean restaurant and I had to get out of there very quickly because I got so sad/angry/just plain moody!!!! The reason I got like that was because it reminded of how my ex and I would have been coming back from our Caribbean trip :(
Anyhow, a friend last night told me that I should start going to the places where my ex and I used to go, i.e. restaurants, or stores. But the thing is that I'm really nervous about that idea. I mean is it dumb of me to feel so queasy when I pass by his neighborhood? Is it weird of me to try really hard to not go to the restaurants were my ex and I were so cozy?
I did do something like that this past Saturday. I went to one of the fav. restaurants were my ex and I would go, but I felt so weird and most of all the memories kept coming back so quickly and I just felt uncomfortable. But I keep reminding myself that he doesn't own those places and those were my fav. places before it became 'our' fav. places!
So yes today is one month and i'm still here breathing.