fed up

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-04-2004
fed up
2
Mon, 04-23-2007 - 2:34am
After almost 24 yrs of marriage, raising 4 wonderful successful children, my husband and I have grown apart.
I realized this when he left his e-mail open and I found that he had been advertising on several singles web sites and had been communicating with not only someone he had met at a bar but also someone he used to work with.
I confronted him and we both agreed that we had spent so much time and energy focusing on our kids and jobs that we had forgotten how to be a couple. So we tried to work things out. Our sex life got better for a while but thats about it. We still don't have ANY thing in common. I resent the fact that even though I work just as many hours as he does I am still the one that does the majority of the cleaning and shopping. Because I work later, he will go out to eat rather than cook, which had put a strain on the budget. The only time he does do any cleaning it's after I blow a gasket.If I get mad he gets madder, then he'll do something "symbolic" like vaccuming ( which he expects me to accknowlege) But a few day later it's back to the same old stuff.
I am tired of being a nag.
We both realized that things can't go back to the way things were when we first got married or even when I was a stay at home mom raising the kids.
I feel like we would be better roommates until financially we can split.
How do I let him know that this might be the best solution?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
In reply to: lkmccall
Mon, 04-23-2007 - 1:04pm

Welcome to the board lkmccall,


Is counseling an option?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-12-2007
In reply to: lkmccall
Mon, 04-23-2007 - 8:39pm

I do not see how being roomates would be a good solution. If you are sure you want to seperate then I suggest you figure out a way to make it on your own. My ex-husband lived with me for a month after the divorce because he could not afford his own place (he spent all his money on drinks and lap dances). We had horrible fights and it was very uncomfortable.

I truly hope things work out for you!