fight too much but still love eachother
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fight too much but still love eachother
| Fri, 06-09-2006 - 3:25pm |
i'm 17 and my first real boyfried, my first love, and i broke up on monday. we had been together about 10 months and it was a long distance relationship because we both were at different schools in different states. we met last summer and were together for 2 weeks before we had to leave each other. the first few months of our relationship were amazing and i fell deeply in love with him. but after that, we started fighting a lot. we're both stubborn, he has a bad temper, and we disagree on many things because we are completely different people. however, we were so in love that we didn't want to let what we had go because of the fighting, and we thought that a big reason for all the fighting was because the long distance was too hard. when we saw each other during the year, we didn't fight as much, but we still did. we "broke up" and took breaks and everything during the year to see if that would fix the problem and it always did for a little while and then we would fall back into the constant fighting. we loved each other so much and tried everything we could to make our relationship work. but we both got home for the summer last week and had a huge fight and decided that we just can't do it anymore. but the incredibely hard part is that we are both still in love with each other, and even though i know this is probably the right thing to do, i don't want to. we are still talking and are going to see each other tomorrow as "friends" and he still says he loves me because he does, but that just makes it harder. but the thing is, he's stronger than me and he is dead set on making this break up for real, but i still want to be with him so badly. part of me wants to win him back because i'm scared of losing someone that i love so much, but part of me knows that no matter what we do the relationship can't work..i'm sorry, i don't really know what im asking, but i need advice. should i try one more time to save our relationship? or should i just let it go..and if i let it go, how do i deal with still being in love with him when i talk to him and see him..and all the time..please help.

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I wish I could have replied earlier, but I was out visiting friends and just got home an hour ago. Wow! What a crazy night you've had. Your first post made me cry because you described so well how hard it is to walk away from someone you love. But then the second post was a lot happier. So it sounds like you'll try again. That's ok. Don't feel guilty about it. Follow your heart ... now that you've come to close to the end you know the pain but I think you also know that the pain won't kill you, right? Just make sure that the two of you are able to talk about what you want from the relationship and what's going to happen when you both go back to school in the fall ...
I was thinking about your lack of friends problem, and one possible solution might be to volunteer. You won't necessarily make friends, but it would be a good way to get out and meet new people. Plus, you'll feel good doing something to help other people. And it looks good on your applications for college too. It would also help to get you out of your own head and just thinking about you and him all the time. There's so many people in the world who need help with all kinds of things, and there's so many organizations that need volunteers that you should be able to find something to do for the summer ...
Good luck with the relationship and keep me posted. I'm rooting for you.
--- im in the same situation right now. it is really hard to say good bye to a guy you really love and it is harder when its not what u want.
my advice is do what im doing ... now this is soooooooo hard
but dont see him
dont talk to him.
let him miss you with out getting to see you even a little bit.
let him realize life sucks without you!
be your own person
and try new things.
be happy without him.
he will wonder why your so happy and smiley- then hell know what hes missing!
you were able to live without him before you met him ,so it isnt impossible to live without him now.
i am weak too, just like you said.
my boyfriend dumpped me after 2 years!!!!!!!
then he just moved on like nothing bothered him.
it kills me to know he dosnt want to be my boyfriend any more ,,
but im not going to sit around and cry,,,
im going to learn to love myself again,,
then maybe one day he will come back to me.....
and if not hey...at least i wasnt sitting around like a loser who is weak and pathetic, you know what i mean,,,,,,,
you can tell him how you feel about him but... make it short and sweet,
and if he dosnt feel the same way,,,
all you can do is say " hey at least i tried
and some one else will love me one day."!!!
you are worth it so love your self and respect yourself always
you deserve the best and life is a long journey so dont carry baggage.love ya 25yrsold.
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