Fresh broken meat here....

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-2005
Fresh broken meat here....
3
Thu, 09-22-2005 - 2:31am
Hi everyone...im hoping that by joining this message board, I'll be strong enough to finally stay away from the man. A little background info about me and my ex-relationship is we were a may-december relationship and long distance (inevitable breakup); we were together for about 4 years but it was definately a lightbulb relationship. In the past months i think we both realized that we were growing apart. We fought more often and i saw myself change for the better. He obviously didn't think so. I became more confident in myself and began to actually feel like a sexy woman. I really wanted to share this newfound feeling with him but i think he liked it when i was less verbal towards him and more subdued/passive/depressed as a woman. As the months grew on, we grew further and further apart; we talked about it and tried to get back into it but for some reason i felt akward talking to him which made me extremely sad. But two days ago it basically errupted; we yelled and screamed at each other and it ended up telling me that he doesn't love me like he use to. It was inevitable this would happen but within the 4 years, we've done this before but we always ended up going back. This time i really want to get over it and i obviously need help doing it. I'm hoping the women here will give me strength to get over it and hopefully move on with my life. Have any advice for the fresh meat here? And is it normal to be relieved but extremely sad??? This is my first long term full out love go on a limb do what he wants relationship so i have the biggest open wound right now...
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 09-22-2005 - 6:31am

I can relate..mine was a LD AND May Dec. of 3.5 years. I wanted to end it many times. We split many times but always got back together. This time he met someone very quickly and so my pride will NOT let me call. There have been a few email exchanges but nothing full of emotion or drama.

Take time for you, NC for awhile ok? Like a long time if needed. Hold you head up high and have dignity. When the road gets rough, come here..DO NOT RUN TO HIM. And most of all, do not rebound. Be alone, sit with your feelings. Yes, the sadness is OVERWHELMING. But this is what needs to happen right now. Peace.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-23-2005
Fri, 09-23-2005 - 2:38pm

I've been there.....4 years with some is hard breaking up, but if you can walk about now, stop talking to him complety not think about whats right in the relationship, you will feel much better......Im sure that you are thinking that your life is over and there is no one else for you, but I'm sure there is, you just dont need to settle for anything less than what YOU want.....thats whats important.....Not what makes your ex feel happy but what makes you feel happy........

It sucks, it will hurt, the sooner you end things the better you will feel better faster :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-20-2005
Sat, 09-24-2005 - 6:09pm
I think it's completely normal for you to feel relieved and extremely sad at the same time.
I went through the same kinds of emotions :)
Good luck and big hugs!
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