Giving it until Sunday, then breaking NC
Find a Conversation
Giving it until Sunday, then breaking NC
| Thu, 01-03-2008 - 2:43pm |
I've decided against everyone elses advice, that I just cant do it.
| Thu, 01-03-2008 - 2:43pm |
I've decided against everyone elses advice, that I just cant do it.
Pages
Well, every experience is unique, this is 100 percent true.
But, I will say this from too many experiences. No Contact heals.
One of my ex-bf's is a great,great friend. We lived together for four years, our ending was mutual and done over a bottle of red wine and a pack of smokes. we lived together until i was ready to move on to a new apartment and then the day i moved out we hugged, cried and he said he was always there for me.
Despite ALL that, it still took 6 months of no physcial contact and 3 months of NC to be able to think of him as just a friend. AND THEN, it still took a full year from the breakup, to finally hear him talk about girls without feeling like i had failed.
My point to all this, is that although every person's relationship/breakup is unique, it seems that healing comes from reflection. And reflection comes from taking time for oneself and sans the person who they are trying to get reflective about. Which basically means: NC.
Furthermore, can one actually receive closure from another person? It just seems as if closure comes from within. I have had ex bf's apologize a 190 different ways, but it wasn't until i forgave myself and HIM in my heart that I was truly able to let go.
But, this is what works for me. Took years of heartbreaking phonecalls where i was crying and asking "WHY, WHY, WHY" for me to finally learn that NC=no new hurts.
But, then again, that's just me.
Good luck Daisy! Whatever you do is part of your process.
best to you!
You're absolutely right that it's based on experience--because I've never known of
Well spoken, Daisy! Your presentation of your own “reality check” is quite eloquent. Communication is a dying tradition, I am sad to report. I am glad it is not lost on you, and it was my pleasure to support you in your effort to seek a
paprgrrl write:"Well, every experience is unique, this is 100 percent true.
But, I will say this from too many experiences. No Contact heals."
I understand writing it out because writing is therapeutic but why do you have to give it to him?
Pages