hard to move on
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hard to move on
| Sun, 01-21-2007 - 1:27pm |
i was just surfing the net for something to relax me a bit from my constant crying.
i came across this website and it looked interesing. i just decided to write down about my breakup just like all the others.
i broke up with him about a month ago. i'm still in the same mood as i was a month ago, it seems like i'll stay at the same spot forever. for the first time in my life i realize i'm so weak, i can't get over a failed relationship. we had been together for 2years and a half, on and off. we had our ups and downs, he wasn't perfect, i tried my best to make our relation go in the right direction. he was confused, and he started confusing me. sometimes when i was with him i'd think i would be better off without him, yet i love him so much i cant get away from him. i don't know why i still love him.
i read all the advices on the net to get over a breakup, but nothing seems interesting and worth trying. i can't get out of this negative mood, i feel i'm depressed all the time. although my brain realizes i'm better off without him, and i know it would be even more painful if this breakup happens later, but still my heart is controlling all my actions. i want to stay friends, but i know it's not gonna help me. i just want to stay in touch with him, my life is sooooo empty now that he's gone. i can't stop thinking about him, i try my best not to contact him, unless he does.
i'm so confused with myself, i'm starting to hate myself.
every time we break up, he comes back to me a few days later. this time he didn't come though, and it's been a month. he spoiled me, now i can't accept today.
I love him more than anything in this world, i don't know how to get out of this circle.
i came across this website and it looked interesing. i just decided to write down about my breakup just like all the others.
i broke up with him about a month ago. i'm still in the same mood as i was a month ago, it seems like i'll stay at the same spot forever. for the first time in my life i realize i'm so weak, i can't get over a failed relationship. we had been together for 2years and a half, on and off. we had our ups and downs, he wasn't perfect, i tried my best to make our relation go in the right direction. he was confused, and he started confusing me. sometimes when i was with him i'd think i would be better off without him, yet i love him so much i cant get away from him. i don't know why i still love him.
i read all the advices on the net to get over a breakup, but nothing seems interesting and worth trying. i can't get out of this negative mood, i feel i'm depressed all the time. although my brain realizes i'm better off without him, and i know it would be even more painful if this breakup happens later, but still my heart is controlling all my actions. i want to stay friends, but i know it's not gonna help me. i just want to stay in touch with him, my life is sooooo empty now that he's gone. i can't stop thinking about him, i try my best not to contact him, unless he does.
i'm so confused with myself, i'm starting to hate myself.
every time we break up, he comes back to me a few days later. this time he didn't come though, and it's been a month. he spoiled me, now i can't accept today.
I love him more than anything in this world, i don't know how to get out of this circle.

Lost,
Just a few thoughts. The ladies who post out here are the folks who can really relate to what you are going through and I'm sure they'll help as the day wears on.
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>>>Well, you are depressed. How natural an emotional response. BUT you are really hurting your ability to move on and feel better by the negative messages you are sending to yourself. Like, "I can't get out of this negative mood." Yes, you can and you will. But sending yourself negative, hopeless messages is just making things more difficult.
If you'll scroll on through this board, you'll see that there are sections for people who have progressed to different points of "recovery" from their breakups. Please scroll down and see how the posts change as people move forward. It is really energizing. Like others before you, you will work through this.
Quit telling yourself that you can't. It ain't true.
Best of luck!
MG
Have you considered short term counseling to help you through the worst of what you are feeling?
I highly recommend the book, Feeling Good: New Mood Therapy, by David Burns, MD. It has grest tests in the book to help you figure yourself out and techniques to talk back to those negative thoughts.
Do you journal write? You are going to have to be your #1 project. Make a list of things you enjoy and start doing them. You will have to find ways to motivate yourself. Go for a walk daily. Or run. Build a support system. Make new friends. Contact old friends. Rebuild your life. Pamper yourself. Be kind to yourself.
My best to you on your healing path.
Carrie
Great advice!
David Burns is excellent. His approach is simple and easy to follow.
MG