hating him for the 1st time
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hating him for the 1st time
| Tue, 04-11-2006 - 4:54pm |
i am hating my ex right now which is the first throughout this whole ordeal. i know we both had faults throughout "us" but nothing worth throwing "us" out the door. he may be confused and needs time/space to think but what about how bad i'm hurting. does he even consider this? i understand give him space, give him time but seriously what about what i'm going through during this? today is the first time throughout this situation that i am angry...screw him and his terrible way of treating me. i love him...yes...very much...this is why i'm angry. i was not looking for a bf when he walked into my life. i was happy being alone until the right person came along...thing is...i believe he's the right one but i don't believe in his behaviour as of late and this behavior has blindsided me. i would never treat someone i love like this...never. i would never allow any friend of mine to treat me like this so why, why am i allowing this behavior? he is 33 yrs old he should know better. i am 28 i should know better. right now, today i'm angry and sick and tired of waiting. i want someone to love me like i love them. i am worth it damn it.

k.scarlett.k
Im with you. I am also 28 and was dating a 33 yr old for about 3 years until exactly 1 month ago today he broke it off with me b/c he said he was not ready to commit to me. He said he needed time to be with himself and his family after a family member went through some problems. I miss him terrible but now im upset that he was able to move on so easily. We didnt take a "break." I iniated the conversation and he made up his mind that he wasnt sure and maybe never would be. I tried to convince him for the first week wich he seemed sad and confused, then I cut off contact and made the mistake of calling him 14 days later. He seemed so happy, everything was fine with him. And in the meantime here I am crying off and on. Remembering all the nice moments, blaming myself. And him, he is just thinking of himself, i dont stay angry long but at least I can shop and eat when I am. : ) Its been 8 days again since we talked and although I still think of him coming back, it seems less and less. I just cant believe he moved on so quickly!Good Luck
well i guess in the big picture you know and i know that things will work out for us whether its with them or not. it's just so hard for me to grasp how you go from loving and wanting to be with someone to i don't know, i just need space. i do think he's a good person with a good heart but right now i just don't believe in his behavior...my limits. i also think they act like all is going well bc they hide from it so they don't have to feel the pain. gosh i wish i could do that...it would be much easier. i hate that he can do that...to me...to us when i know we had a good thing.
good luck to you too!
Hey there. I think some guys try to block their emotions out when they go through a break up. They think that by doing this they can get over it easily. WRONG! In my opinion thats a bad idea as they dont atually deal with the problem, they just put it aside. However, at some point they HAVE to deal with it - at some point their emotions will resurface and they will start to feel the pain. By that point, we'll probably be feeling much better and be getting on with our lives.
When i last spoke to my guy he seemed upset, but i dont think our break up actually sunk in yet. I felt he was trying to put it aside... to hide the pain. My friends boyfriend did the same and after 4 months he actually realised what was going on and came back. He said he had an instinct that she had moved on and it suddenly hit him that they may never be together again.
So just remember... he'll have to deal with it at some point. At this stage he's hiding it - but it will soon kick in. No-one knows whats going to happen, but that makes the future all the more exciting :)
Good luck and keep posting :)
(hugs)
Wow k.Scarlett.k, you definitely gave me food for thought after reading your post. My situation is so similar to yours, with my boyfriend/fiance breaking up with me after 10 years over a petty argument. It finally occurred to me that if he really loved me or saw us together forever like I did, he would do whatever necessary to work it out whether we went to counseling together or something else.
You definitely hit the nail on the head when you said you deserve to be loved the way you love him, and I'm holding on to the belief that it will happen for everyone hurting from a bad breakup. Everyone deserves to be treated with the utmost respect and if you're in a committed relationship you should be able to expect even more from your partner.
Stay strong and if feeling angry helps you work through the pain than feel it because I know that's the only thing that's helping me right now and it's better than blaming yourself which is what I spent weeks doing.
GOOD LUCK & I WISH YOU THE BEST!