Having a bad night...
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|Sun, 01-20-2013 - 10:53pm|
Long story short I found out my ex had another girlfriend and was playing us both. This was the end of October. We have not been in contact except the occassional text about exchanging things through a mutual friend who doesn't mind being our go-between.
What is killing me right now is that my ex never apologized... I know that sounds stupid... but it really matters to me and I know it shouldn't. Every logical bone in my body is telling me that he is a liar any way and even if he did apologize it doesn't matter because he is full of shit. But after 2 1/2 years together it truly ended when I got a 2 am phone call from the other girl. The next morning he called me with her in the room to tell me he had been trying to break-up with me... I told him all he needed to do was tell me he was attracted to someone else or not into me anymore and it would have been over - no questions asked. All he had to say for himself that morning when I told him that was "now you know." After our entire relationship all I got was "now you know." Really?? You couldn't have told me this BEFORE you started sleeping with someone else? I want an apology for lieing and manipulating me.
How do I get past this?? I am going out more, spending more time with my son, joining new social clubs, going back to school, hanging out with friends. I am going through every motion I should be, but I just can't seem to get over the hurt of not getting an apology. In all honesty, I had already realized we weren't going to make it long-term... but I was going to end it with respect, a break up... not run around on him. I just wasn't completely convinced it wasn't going to work... but I knew the writing was on the wall. I hate drama and he brought so much of it into my life. I am glad the relationship is over... so why am I crying three months later?? I am seeing a therapist to try and work this out... why I stayed so long, what I want in the future, how to handle this with my son, etc. I am just looking for advice... something I missed maybe? How do I get through these bad nights without falling apart and totally getting down on myself? I have extended periods of good days when I don't even think about him, but I was sobbing for an hour tonight... all because he texted me asking if I had seen his ipod. I just don't know what to do with myself. Help please :)