Having Trouble Letting Go

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Having Trouble Letting Go
11
Mon, 09-20-2004 - 2:38pm
Here's my story. I'm wondering if you all would have any advice. I broke up with my boyfriend on Sunday, September 12. When I woke up the next morning I felt really awful and began emailing and text-messaging him. While I didn't exactly say, "I made a mistake, please take me back," I did ask if he would be willing to go to therapy with me. I did say I would like to try again.

I sent him a lot of emails on Monday, a bit less on Tuesday and so forth. They dwindled to none by the weekend. I did however text-message him like a crazy woman all week long. Whenever anything made me think of him I would text message him.

I figured there wasn't any harm in it. While I didn't exactly think it would bring him back to me, I hoped he would be reading my messages and that he might be persuaded to try again. I haven't heard from him at all. Not a peep. I will not call because I feel like I've reached out to him enough already.

One important detail to note is that I'm text messaging him from a phone he gave me. I returned the phone when we broke up, but I still have access to the Web site where I can text him. I sent him instructions to change the user ID and password to the phone should he want to, but he still hasn't. In a sense I figure if he didn't want to hear from me anymore that he would have taken care of that. After all, it takes less than five minutes. So I guess what I'm thinking is he still wants to hear from me, even though he isn't responding. (Does that sound crazy?)

I know I need to let go, that if he wants to try again he has to come back to me of his own volition. But is it ok to text him a few times a day? Especially since he still hasn't changed the password? What do you think?


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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2004
Tue, 09-21-2004 - 10:32pm


Don't text him I just left my x a message and I think he was home. We have a trip planned and I feel like I need to stay in contact so I am not traveling with a stranger.

But, I felt mortified when he did not answer. I could kick myself for calling when I swore I would not do so.

Be strong. You may have questions but if he hasn't responded by now the answers you'll get will probably be distorted. Good luck. Be strong. I am trying, and filing feels just as bad, if not worse, than missing him.

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