He just left...
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| Sat, 04-28-2007 - 12:50pm |
My husband and I were married for 10 years. We met in the military together and fell in love. It was a struggle because the day before we got married I had to be stationed in Panama and throughout the entire year there I was fighting my way back to him in FT. Riley, KS and so was he. I did get orders to come back to Kansas to be with him and our marriage was pretty good. When we both got out in the year 98 we moved to the Chicago suburbs to start our civilian life together. We wanted kids and were trying but one of my ovaries had a benign cyst in it so they removed the entire ovary. We still had faith that we could have kids working with the one ovary left but I had issues with fibroids and estrogen levels, etc. We tried a couple of IUI (artificial insemination) and 1 IVF but failed. At the time I was working at a full time job with benefits but that's when the 911 happened and a month later I was laid off. It was pretty expensive living in Streamwood, IL and looking for a job was even harder with all the temp agencies taking over. He had to take on a big load supporting me with on and off temp jobs. We had a family of 5 American Eskimos that he had a hard time with after a while and mentioned that I should give a couple away but I couldn't do it. We managed to sell the house and move to Indianapolis in late 2003, and had to stay with my parents until we found another house. The house we got in Indianapolis was very nice and we still had our 5 dogs. At first the job situation was good and I worked for a good company but again it was temporary and after getting the house I soon quit to pursue a petsitting business. I tried and tried but the market wasn't as up to date with this sort of business for me so I was back to finding a regular gig mostly through temp jobs, I did manage to achieve a bachelors degree in Visual Communications(graphic,web design) and looked for work in that field soon after graduating. After many interviews was not successful in Indianapolis. My husband had his share of switching jobs but his were more stable men type jobs driving to different states like the "can you hear me?" guy with the cell phone. That took a toll on me as far as being alone but he got promoted in the job which led us to Virginia. While in Indianapolis we got another puppy a pitbull mix and at first everything was good but then our older dogs started fighting with her and after her puberty stage she started mauling our smaller female dogs. So we had to keep them separate. Before coming to Virginia I let him take our two female american eskimos with him to set up house in Virginia when I got there he had took it upon himself to get rid of my two girl dogs which really broke my heart and trust I had with him. I think that is where our marriage changed because I could never trust him with the dogs. He always had an issue with Polo because he would always beat up Sheena the pit bull mix and his brother. So I was made to give him up to my parents.
We didn't stay in the house very long maybe 2 1/2 years so we knew we may have a loss. Debt had piled up on us paying for the house in Indy and a rental house in Virginia with all the bills at both places. I did happen to find a job in my field rather quickly which was good to help out but his job was super stressful as a manager working like 12-14 hours a day and going to school online full time with all this debt. He said that he would never let debt break up our marriage but I guess that and other issues broke him. We were unable to continue our fertility treatments because we either couldn't afford it or were not in a state that covers fertility, he did say that it did bother him that he could not have kids with me but that it didn't matter as long as we are together.
But he left me this past Thursday with a note saying that I could take his last paychecks and that he has worked for man and now will work for God. Don't think it...Do it!
With his wedding ring, keys to the house, his ATM card, and under the letter our marriage certificate. He left everything, most of his clothes, his computer, even his keyboard that he makes music with. His work cell phone and personal cell phone. The last thing he looked up on the internet was one way ticket to Hawaii, hawaii jobs and the Peace Corps. He asked me last weekend if I would like to do something completely different to help people and wanted to know if I would drop everything to go to the peace corps and I said no because we have our pets and obligations, bills and so forth. We recently had to foreclose on our house in Indianapolis because we no longer could pay for it and he has bills that he let go to collections but we had planned on paying for it. He is leaving me with all this mess but I cannot afford to pay for his bills only mine. I will try to stay in Virginia even if I have to look for a job real quick to keep up on the rent at this little house but if I can't I will have to go back to Indianapolis where my family is.
I'm sorry this is so long but I had to get this out to relieve some pain in my heart.

Welcome to the board madtalentinfo,
Sorry you are going through this. I can't believe he was willing to drop everything to help strangers, but leave you in a bind, not willing to help you .