He moved on so fast.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
He moved on so fast.
5
Mon, 08-13-2007 - 3:25pm

I broke up with my x boyfriend about 2 months ago due to the fact that i was become unhappy with the relationship and began to get bothered with the "close' friendship him and his girlfriends were having. We stopped the communication for about 2 weeks. I began to get private calls on my cell back to back everyday for the past 3 weeks. Came to find out it was him calling and not saying anything. In honest truth i missed him dearly. One night we saw each other exchanged hellos and went our seperate ways. He called he that same night and we hooked up. Ever since then began slowly speaking again, but nothing was confirmed about our relationship. Meanwhile during the break i met someone who i enjoyed hang out with but made it clear to him i didnt want anything at the time.

Yesterday my new friend and I went to play volleyball at a park and from a distance i saw my x's office mate notice me. I felt uncomfortable but went with my evening game. I got home and say my x call. He called again private and than not private insulting me with all words possible. He told me he was now going to move on an get back with his 1st girlfriend before me . He told me to leave him alone that he was going to take this matter perhaps a restraining order... I do fill slightly guilty letting him back into my life but i still care for him but i wasnt going to limit myself from meeting new people.

That same weekend I went to a lounge with a group of my girlfriends and i saw him walk with his "ex" (the new girl friend) hand in hand. I was mortified. It killed me inside to see him move on so fast especially a girl from his previous past. I never have felt a knife through my chest the way did that night. I went with my entire evening as if nothing bothered me. (INSIDE I WAS DYING)

As the end of all this, i do admit in some parts of the past relationship with my x, i have made mistake and was selfish. But at times i felt that the realtionship was begining to become an emotional abuse. There was to much pride on both sides. Its been hard to move on and remove this guy from my heart. Someone who we went through good and bad moment,and we experienced a 1 month pregnancy together.

Ive been going out with girlfriends that have been very supportive in helping me through this.

But regardless, im extreamly bothered Please help?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2007
Mon, 08-13-2007 - 4:03pm

You went through a lot together. I think it's understandable that you'd be bothered even though you see logically that the two of you aren't right for each other.

I would just suggest you continue doing what you're doing.

cheers
Susanna

- There comes a point in your life when you realize who matters, who never did, who won't anymore, and who always will. So don't worry about people from your
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 08-13-2007 - 7:36pm

You're bothered because you never really detached from him. That's the danger of keeping in touch like you've been doing.

Cut off all contact so that you can start the process of moving on.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2007
Mon, 08-13-2007 - 8:44pm
Restraining order? Insults? Threatening to get back with an ex and then do it to hurt you? That poor girl - he's just using her! He sounds like a jerk to me. I would move on and be glad to be rid of him. He sounds like there's something seriously wrong with him.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Tue, 08-14-2007 - 11:32am
Thank you for your advice, i agree the "new gf" is beening used. He went back into his doll collection for a show and tell.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Tue, 08-14-2007 - 11:44am

Sheri,

Your completly right. I sit here thinking and living in a fantasy world hoping to see him at the intersection waiting at the light,seating in my parking lot, or grocery store . I did change my number that same night i got the threatening insults.

The best thing i need to do is detaching my self from him completly in order for me to move on. (Something i had never done in the past of our 2 yr on and off relationship)

Again Sheri and other for your great support and making this situation an easy battle to overcome.

THANKS!