He never loved me
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He never loved me
| Sun, 12-10-2006 - 1:27pm |
Sometimes it's better to not know the truth. My ex and I broke up after 5 mts because it seemed he was unready for a relationship at the time. (He had just got out of a 5 yrs relationship).. We continued talking sproratically after the breakup since it was amicalbe and then started hanging out more and talking more. Things were going ok until I started bringing up "us" and what happened to "us". Basically he told me he never fell in love with me and "we" stopped feeling right although he wants us to stay close friends. I'm not sure why but knowing this hurt me a million times more than believing he was just not ready for relationship. It's like he knew we were going to break up from the very start and makes me wonder incessantly what went wrong... I don't know if I can say I fell deeply in love with him either but I thought I was...
He's with another girl now and yet always wants to stay close friends with me. I get so upset when I find out anything about them. I have tried to keep my distance but always end up hanging out with him some way. I don't have the heart to tell him that it's too hard to be his friend partially because I really want to believe we can be friends and partially because I don't want him to have the satisfaction of thinking I still want him... But after certain things he has said to me and how hurt it feels to think of him with this new girl, I don't think we can be. I don't want him back yet why am I constantly feeling hurt after I see/talk to him?
What do I do?
I plan in the New Year to get so busy I don't have to think about him.
He's with another girl now and yet always wants to stay close friends with me. I get so upset when I find out anything about them. I have tried to keep my distance but always end up hanging out with him some way. I don't have the heart to tell him that it's too hard to be his friend partially because I really want to believe we can be friends and partially because I don't want him to have the satisfaction of thinking I still want him... But after certain things he has said to me and how hurt it feels to think of him with this new girl, I don't think we can be. I don't want him back yet why am I constantly feeling hurt after I see/talk to him?
What do I do?
I plan in the New Year to get so busy I don't have to think about him.

You feel hurt because you don't get over romantic feelings for someone overnight! That's just not how it works. It takes time and no contact to do that.
If you want to keep banging your head against that particular wall by continuing to hang out with him, that's your choice of course, but you are not going to feel better until you stand up for yourself and take a break from seeing each other.
Sheri
I feel as if I suggest to someone, once a week, not to try to hang out or be friends with an ex...especially right after.
Susan
"Success is building a foundation wit
I need time to stop thinking about "us" in order to move forward and being around him alot doesn't let me do so. I kept reminding myself of why the relationship didn't work out and that atleast he was in my life as a friend, but this approach is not helping me. I just keep feeling hurt and reminded of the sadness I felt when we were first broken up. Thanks for everyone's input. I'm learning the hard way but I'm trying to change.
It's sounds to me as though you were a rebound girl from the start. He just got out of a 5 year relationship? Does he have kids? I would definetly stay out of contact with him. Don't call him and just see what happens. Maybe he never did love you, but I hear people say that a lot when they are angry. All I can say is stay away and see if he calls you. Tell him the truth. That you can't be friends because it hurts to bad. Then leave it alone. Things will get better.
My ex left me after 6 years toether and 2 kids. He immediatly had a new gf and now a new one. We have only been broken up for 1 1/2 months so I know it hurts. Just stay strong and move on. We both know you can and will. I already am slowly and I was with him so long. Reality hurts, but that's just what it is... REALITY!!!
Stay strong and don't call him. Make him call you. And when he does, tell him the truth. You will feel better once you have.
-Andrea